Page 43 of Mafiosa
Luca was watching the stars.
Seriously. This guy.
I clambered out of the window, my knees wobbling until my feet found purchase on the roof. I slipped and caught myself on the ledge, cursing under my breath.
Luca’s head snapped towards me. ‘Sophie?’ he said, bewildered. ‘What are you doing out here?’
I offered him an awkward half-wave as I crouched in front of the window to get my balance. ‘Um, star gazing?’ I said. ‘Mind if I join you?’
I couldn’t see his eyes in the darkness, but he tilted his head to one side. ‘Suit yourself.’
I scooted towards him, crab-walking with my hands and feet.
‘It’s really not hard,’ he pointed out. ‘You can walk, you know.’
‘What if I fall?’ I said, horrified.
‘I won’t let you fall.’
I finally reached him. He pulled his legs up, resting his forearms on his knees as he regarded me in the darkness.
I mirrored his pose. ‘Hi,’ I said, feeling a little breathless.
‘Hello.’ Luca tilted his head back, and I looked up, too. The sky was clear, and blanketed with thousands of stars. It was beautiful out here in the countryside where there were no street lamps to steal the natural light, no distractions to block it out. It was bright, and magical, and I had never noticed before. Because I never looked up.
‘There’s a meteor shower tonight,’ he said. ‘Have you ever seen one?’
‘I’ve never even seen a shooting star,’ I said, still watching the sky, hoping to catch a glimpse of something. When I looked at him again, I found he was looking at me too. We were right next to each other, his fingers so close to mine that if I moved an inch, we’d be touching. It was the closest we had been in weeks.
‘Are you mad at me?’ I asked.
‘Yes,’ he said without hesitation. ‘I am mad at you.’
A part of me wanted to ask why, but I already knew. I was a different person now. I wanted things he didn’t want me to have. I wanted revenge and he couldn’t stomach it. He couldn’t stomach who I was becoming.
‘I’m sorry,’ I said quietly. I didn’t dare look up at him. Icould feel the heat of his gaze on my cheeks.
‘Are you sorry that you were prepared to go through with it tonight, or that in the end, you couldn’t?’
I looked at our fingers, almost entwined. ‘I’m sorry that I’m not good enough for this family. I’m sorry you had to fight so hard for me, and this is what you got.’ I hesitated, waiting for my voice to stop wavering. ‘I’m sorry I’m such a coward.’
Luca dipped his chin, the movement dragging my gaze back up.
He was frowning at me. ‘You think shooting someone makes you brave?’
‘I don’t know,’ I said. ‘All I know is I couldn’t do it when the time came. All I know is I failed my test.’
‘I’m glad you failed,’ he said.
‘You had to lie for me. You made them all lie for me. You made them lie to their boss.’
‘I don’t care.’
‘But you never lie to Valentino.’
‘This is different.’
‘How?’
