Page 25 of An Honorable Deception
That was what her best friend thought of her? That she would toy with one of her dearest friends and then leave him with a broken heart?
Of course it was. What else could she think? Lavinia had done that very thing before.
Even so, the arrow dug deep into her pounding heart, and she had to look away. Her shoulders wanted to slump, but she couldn’t let them. The lessons that Mother and Miss Feuerstein had ingrained in her ran too deep. She drew them back instead, forced her chin up a notch, and wished with everything in her that Penelope would come hooting her way out of the stable and destroy the mood.
Where was the little monkey when she needed her?
“You’re not giving your brother enough credit,” she said evenly. “He is being a good friend. Nothing more. But even if I’m wrong, even if I could hurt him, I won’t.”Not again.“You have my word. And if the only way to guarantee that in your eyes is not to flirt or tease him anymore, then fine. I won’t engage with him when he does it.”Even if those are the only times in the last year I’ve laughed.“Is that what you want?”
Marigold sighed, her hand coming to a rest against the round of her stomach. “I don’t want to see him hurt.”
Because she was a good sister, and Yates was the most important person in the world to her, outside of her husband and unborn child. That was as it should be. As expected.
It shouldn’t make Lavinia feel more alone than ever. It shouldn’t make her heart ache in a way that had nothing to do with the amount of blood she’d sent pumping through it or the disease that had nearly killed her by weakening the organ.
“I don’t want to see him hurt either.” She forced a smile and prayed that Marigold was too blinded by her concern for Yates to see how fake it was.
Then she prayed shewouldsee. That she would care. That she would wrap her in a hug and take back the conversationthey’d had and tell Lavinia that she could still claim those pockets of joy.
Penelope must have belatedly received her silent cry for intervention. She came running out of the stable, her skirt—purple today—billowing in the breeze and her tail hooked in a way that usually made Lavinia grin. The little capuchin monkey looked around, hooting, clearly scanning for Yates, who was her favorite person in the world. When she didn’t spot him, Lavinia half expected her to turn back to the stables and settle for Hector.
Instead, she ran their way, no doubt to climb Marigold and take a place onhershoulder, since Yates’s wasn’t available.
But no, it was Lavinia that she leapt onto, going from the ground to her shoulder before she could even register her surprise. It wasn’t that she’d never played the part of Penelope’s perch before—it was that Penelope rarely chose her and neverfirst.
Maybe the monkey reallyhadheard her silent cry for help. Or maybe God had given the animal a nudge. Marigold hadn’t given her a hug, but someone was, more or less. Lavinia smiled and ran her fingers down the tail curling around her neck. “Good morning, Penelope.”
Marigold sighed. “I didn’t mean to imply that you would intentionally hurt him. You must know that. I only want to make certain you’re aware of the risks.”
The risks to Yates’s heart. The risk ofhimhurting.
Understandable. It was. Truly.
“I know. You’re a good sister.” Lavinia turned away from the stable, away from her friend. She forced another smile as she looked over her shoulder and said, “I think I’ll walk a bit, try to loosen these muscles. Say hello to Leonidas for me.”
Marigold didn’t try to stop her. Happily, Penelope didn’t abandon her either as she strode away, just put a little pawonto the top of Lavinia’s head to steady herself. Ordinarily, Lavinia would have wanted to go straight into the house, bathe, and dress in something more familiar than the exercise garb. She would have taken comfort in brushing out her hair and winding it up into a chignon. But the thought of walls didn’t suit, and the sun was warm and welcoming. Since it would likely rain again by afternoon, she might as well stay out enjoying it now.
She had no destination in mind, other than to avoid, as she always did, the path toward the seaside cliffs. She circled the house and the gardens that hadn’t been properly tended in six years but somehow looked wild and inviting instead of neglected, ending up at the far side of the property, well away from the outbuildings.
When she spotted a figure on the little first-floor balcony, she started. She hadn’t expected Lady Alethia to be out of bed yet, but she sat there with a cup of tea in hand, her eyes on the sky. Zelda must have brought pillows out to cushion the wrought-iron chair for her.
For a moment, she considered spinning about before she was spotted so that she could maintain her solitude—and avoid the embarrassment of being seen in such strange clothes. She decided against it a mere second before Lady Alethia took note of her and smiled down a greeting. “Good morning, my lady.” She didn’t so much as blink out of turn at Lavinia’s outfit.
It made her shoulders relax a degree. “Lavinia, please. All the ‘lady’ business feels a bit cumbersome in a place like this, doesn’t it?” She walked up the stone steps and took the second chair at the little table. Zelda hadn’t put any cushions on it, and Lavinia barely suppressed a wince as she lowered her aching muscles onto the cool metal.
“It does, at that. And so you must call me Alethia as well.”Her wide-eyed gaze settled on Penelope, and a delighted laugh slipped from her lips. “And who is this?”
“This is Penelope. Technically she belongs to the Caesars, but we know she’s truly Yates’s.” At the flicker in Alethia’s eyes, she realized belatedly that she really ought to curb the habit of calling him by his first name, at least in company.Fairfaxwas what the guest would expect.
But he’d always been Yates to her. Fairfax still felt more like his father’s name than his.
She cleared her throat. “Penelope, say hello to Lady Alethia.”
Penelope was too well trained to disobey, even if Lavinia wasn’t the one who usually gave the command. She hooted a greeting, bobbed her knees, and held out her skirt as she curtsied.
Naturally, Alethia laughed again. How could anyone be anything but charmed by Penelope? Well, anyone but Genie, who despised the animals from the circus for some reason.
But Alethia’s joy seemed far greater than most guests’. “I haven’t seen monkeys in far too long.” She held out a hand toward Penelope and said something in a language that sounded almost but not quite like Romani.
