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“Fuck.”

I reached between us and slid my hand into his shorts. I removed his long, thick dick, and shifted up. Placing it at my entrance, I slowly circled my hips until he penetrated my opening. Sliding down, I covered his lips with mine and sucked on his bottom lip until Salem took over the kiss. His hands gripped my waist tightly, and he pulled me down, plunging me down his shaft.

I tried to scream at the way he penetrated me and stretched me, but his tongue and mouth swallowed my moans. Salem thrust up into me hard, shaking me up and driving me insane. It wasn’t long before I came on him with no shame. I felt horrible.

Salem lifted me, placed me on my knees, and turned me to face the couch. He drummed into me from behind. He impaled me deeply, and I screamed out. He fucked me hard, fast, and raw, with a blinding fury. I could tell that he was upset, but about what, I wasn’t sure. It wasn’t just in the way he fucked me but also in the energy that surrounded him. Our chemistry was off.

Although I racked my brain, I couldn’t, for the life of me, come up with a single thing. When he came inside of me and released my hips, Salem bit into my shoulder and turned me around to face him again. The mug on his face and the snarl in his voice made it clear that he was not happy with me.

“Nah, this shit ain’t about fucking. I can get a quick fuck anywhere. I told you that I was in it for more than that. Now get that shit through your thick ass head.”

“Salem, I’m sorry. I love you.”

He glared at me. “You don’t get to toy with my fucking feelings, Koi.”

“That’s not what I’m trying to do.” I sobbed.

“Then you need to make up your fucking mind what you want. I ain’t got time for this wishy-washy shit. One minute, you’re down for me, and the next, you’re not. Just like a fucking Pisces, always swimming upstream and then down again. Get ya shit together, li’l mama. ’Cause I’m tired of this rollercoaster ride you keep a nigga on.”

I sat with pain in my heart and tears in my eyes as I watched him get up and stalk out of the living room.

“Oh my God!What time is it, Salem?” I asked, sitting up in bed. He had ignored me for hours last night. When I decided that I should go home, he pulled me into his bedroom and gently made love to me while apologizing for his behavior.

After we made love, we had a long talk, and he laid his feelings out there for me in an effort to be transparent.

I was honest with him and told him that I wasn’t ready to hear all that he said. He was moving too fast, and it scared me. Not because I didn’t want what he had to offer, but I was still worried about what happened in the past. It seemed that I was in a situation that was a replica of the one I had been accused of, and I was afraid the past would come back to haunt me.

We had watched movies all night long, and he had just held me. It was comfortable lying in his bed, with the sheets that smelled of him, and resting my head on his chest. He hadn’t wanted me to go home, but I could still feel the wedge between us, and I had placed it there. He had told me that either I accepted him on his terms or he had to “keep pushing,” throwing it down like a gauntlet. In the end, I stayed.

Salem sat up with a groggy look as I spun around the room, trying to find my phone.

“It’s a little after seven. What’s wrong?” he muttered sleepily, getting out of bed.

“I have a class at eight, and I still have to get home, shower, dress, and get back to campus,” I explained, running out of his room and looking for my clothes.

“Baby, chill. You’ll get there,” he replied lazily through a yawn as he leaned against the doorframe and scratched his head.

“I can’t afford to chill. You only have one class today, but I have a full schedule. I shouldn’t have stayed the night when I knew that I had to be up in the morning.”

Salem strode across the room to me and lifted my chin. “Chill your little anxious ass out with all this panicking. This ain’t the first time you stayed over when you had an early class. You’re never late. Besides, they ain’t gon’ fire you for being late a time or two.”

“I don’t want to start now, okay,” I replied haughtily. “Anyway, I have students relying on me to be there on time.”

I grabbed my purse and my keys. He walked me to the door and tilted my head back. “Give me a kiss, baby.”

“I haven’t brushed my teeth, Salem.”

“I’on give a fuck. You mine. Funky breath and all,” he stated with a chuckle as he grabbed my ass and squeezed.

When Salem lowered his head, he kissed me deeply and thoroughly. I was expecting him to have bad morning breath,but surprisingly, he didn’t, which was what made me more self-conscious. When he pulled back, he remarked, “That’s my girl. A’ight, baby, handle your business. We’ll talk later.”

“See you in class,” I replied as he smacked me on the ass.

“A’ight.” Salem scrunched up his face and rubbed his abs.

I headed out of his apartment and heard him lock the door behind me. I ran down the stairs and hopped into my car. Throughout the drive to my apartment, I glanced in the mirrors and prayed that I would not get a speeding ticket.

Thankfully, my apartment complex was only five minutes from campus. I knew that once I was showered and dressed, it wouldn’t take me long to get to class. On the drive home, all I could think about was how nonchalant Salem’s attitude was about my job, me being late, and everything else. It seemed like the only thing he was concerned about was us indulging ourselves in our feelings for one another.