Page 50 of Her Alien Prince
"She took her own life, you're safe," Trent assured, but it wasn't my safety I cared about.
"Are you real?" I couldn't hope that I was still asleep in his bed this whole time.
I crumpled to the ground, curling in on myself with my wings spasming behind me as the noise in my head intensified. "Arrrghaaa," I groaned with an overwhelming surge of emotions that didn't feel like my own.
"Listen to my voice," he screamed louder than the rest before a calming clucking echoed through the cavern that drowned out the chatter vibrating through my mind.
"Feel," the word resonated and faded.
That's what my kan were now, the sense of the whole hive, and there was no turning it off, I thought with defeat. I would go insane. I shivered and wallowed in the mist of the oasis hidden deep in the Kai Mountains, accepting my fate to succumb to the chaos of my mind, lost to the thoughts of others.
"I'm a wretched soul, but you are not the hives' queen, you are mine. Do you hear me Kansa! Do not retreat from me." A yank jerked in my ribcage, and I gasped at the strength of the jolt. He had to be alive, this wasn't a trick of my mind, and even if it was, I would live here in this illusion for eternity.
"If you are a wretched soul, then so am I. Forsaking my clan, running from the hive, I am wretched. And it's you I can't escape from. I don't want to." I clutched at my chest, and crawled across the ground, begging my body to cooperate. Trent was always truth, even when I doubted him.
I thought about all the reasons why I wanted him that had nothing to do with how my heart sped up when he was near. "You listened to me. You supported me. You never once believed that I was broken, even when I thought you did. I know that now. And it was me who gave up on us when you needed me most. I should have seen the way your eyes were distant. I should have known you weren't yourself. I should have known you needed me."
"I still do, Kansa," he said as his hands scooped me up into his arms. He felt so real, the mist clung to him like colored stars on his skin. "I can't do this without you."
My eyes widened at the sound that felt so close. Hands scrambled up his chest, and cupped his face to confirm he was solid. If he was an illusion, he fooled me, and I didn't care as long as he was mine.
"Why?" I sobbed, and he flinched at my question like it haunted him.
His kan touched against my own, and the noises of the hive quieted to a dull hum at the back of my mind. His voice was like a soothing balm keeping the battle within my mind at bay. "With my mother gone, someone will have to lead the hive. It doesn't have to be you," he quickly added so I didn't misunderstand, "I will take you to a safe sector of the universe if you ask it of me, far away from the cries of the hive, where their voices can not haunt you. We can live simple lives, and others will take up the burdens of what is coming. You've freed the hive, and you need not give anymore."
I knew what he was doing. He was supporting me once more, at the cost of everything he believed in. He did it before and he's doing it again. He tricked the Almder into agreeing to his cleverly worded treaty about bringing his mate back, he had no obligation to find Luan, bridge the peace between planets, or defend the sector against King Sylve's ships before the trill came to re-establish their claim on what was theirs by name... The Trillume Galaxy.
My lip quivered thinking about how this whole time he never wanted to burden me with taking over being Queen of Krelis. We were supposed to come to Kai Mountain to solidify our bond, and here we were in the heart of the mountain prepared to flee if I decided to disappear into ignorance. He wouldn't blame me for it, but I would. I had something Krelis needed to fight against King Sylve, and to deny the buzz at the back of my head was to abandon them all.
I wasn't my mother. I couldn't do it.
"Mabel," Trent spoke softly, hesitant.
"Say it," I urged, when he wouldn't continue what he started.
"Your mother was a kind krelin, I should be so honored to be gifted by Queen Leahme more than once in a lifetime. Once when she blessed my life into this world, and again when her daughter became part of my soul." I was sobbing, tears streaming on his shoulder from where I clung. He explained what his mother said about Queen Leahme, and his suspicions about her death. I stayed cradled in his arms for a long time, as he kept his kan touching my own to quiet the voices of the hive.
With a hiccup, I finally spoke, "I don't believe in fate, but I don't have to believe in it to be thankful that you're part of my life and we discovered this cave."
"What is going through that mind of yours, kansa?"
I forced a smile and pulled my face away from his chest. "I know what this place is, and why the queens can reach the whole hive across distances even through space."
He blinked at me, probably never questioning why it was ever possible as it was always something he lived with since being spawned. It always was. Trent grinned back at me, wiping moisture from under my eye with his thumb. "My mother admonished me for never questioning more than simply her rulership over the hive, and I felt foolish. I understand now more than ever that I was always a warrior, there to defend and waiting for the day you would come along to open our minds. Tell me, why was my mother’s reach even present on Estreldez, regardless of where she was in the universe?"
He wasn't mocking me, he was genuinely eager for what I had to say, and for the first time in all my years as an advisor I felt... heard.
"This pool is full of nanobots, and I think all of Krelis has them... floating in the pollen we breathe. It's possible the molt is caused by faulty technology reacting poorly to biomaterial in the body. I've been in a medpod before, and I know what it feels like to be submerged in one."
"That doesn't account for hearing our thoughts, and no other species visiting is able to join the hive mind," he disagreed, it was like I was talking to a fellow researcher challenging to help me flush out my thoughts, not to disparage me, but to clarify.
I nodded fervently, wrapping my mind around the new theory with all the observations I'd made. "Right, I think that has to do with krelins specifically and how they, we," I corrected, accepting that I was one, "interact with the nanobots. Naturally, krelins communicated through sound waves with their kan before they spoke." I added through my thoughts, "Somehow the nanobots have translated patterns in the way our kan produce sound waves when we think, and perhaps it's similar to morse code... krelin code."
He laughed and lifted me up into a twirling embrace, our wings buzzing with the motion. "The nanobots could connect over long distances because there was always a ship, or technology within reach for them to connect with, pinging from one connection to the next until it established a hold." Trent paused, narrowing his brows in thought. "But the queens..."
"I can't answer everything, but I suspect it has something to do with a queen's ability to sense and feel more. But, you said so yourself that you could communicate through Chief Ong... you aren't a queen."
He nodded his understanding and pressed his kan to mine. A hum vibrated through my mind. "Nanobots or not... you are." He took my breath away. Even if I didn't want the responsibility of queen, when he said it, I wanted nothing more than for him to tell me I was his queen. My lips lifted to graze across his, and he moaned. All the noise of the hive's nanobots trying to communicate with me was nothing but a dull echo, forgotten to the thrum of my heart synchronizing with his before I couldn't stand the distance any longer. I lifted to meet his lips as they crashed into mine, both of us having the same thought, "Mine."
