Damian mutters something, but I pretend not to hear it.
Once Hunter is clean, Damian scoops him up and glares at me.
“I hate you.”
I grin. “No, you don’t.”
Damian exhales sharply, rubbing a hand down his face, before plopping down on the couch with Hunter in his lap. He looks exhausted when he realizes he is still wearing the soiled shirt, he sniffs it and groans. I move toward the dresser and grab him a shirt. I toss it to him, and he lays Hunter across his lap while he quickly removes his shirt and replaces it.
Damian looks like he’s aged at least a decade in the past five minutes or maybe since Tandi arrived.
Hunter, on the other hand? Completely unfazed.
The kid coos up at him, drool trailing down his chin as if he hadn’t just unleashed hell into that last diaper.
Damian is still holding him, his hands awkwardly stiff as he adjusts the baby’s position every few seconds like he’s trying to find the least dangerous way to hold a child.
I slowly sip my coffee, enjoying this more than I probably should. “Relax, man. He’s not gonna explode.”
Damian side-eyes me hard. “You don’t know that. You didn’t just clean what came out of him.”
I snort. “It’s not gonna happen again that fast.”
At that exact moment, Hunter lets out a suspicious-sounding noise.
Damian freezes.
I swear to the Goddess, he stops breathing.
His entire body locks up, his eyes widening in absolute horror. He slowly looks down at Hunter, as if praying it was just a false alarm.
Then he lifts the kid slightly and sniffs the air.
I’ve never seen a man go from praying to the heavens to cursing his entire existence so fast.
Damian holds him up and sniffs the air, then relaxes and sets him back down. “False alarm,” he tells me.
Hours Later…
The girls have been gone for hours.
Hunter and Tyson? Still wide awake.
Damian? Hanging on by a thread.
We move to the living area, where Tyson is playing on the rug, babbling to himself while Hunter props against Damian’s chest, happily chewing on his fist.
Damian had attempted to get Hunter to sit up on his own, but the kid immediately collapsed like a sack of potatoes and just started wiggling on the floor like a stranded fish.
“Okay, how the hell do babies learn to do anything?” Damian grumbles, adjusting Hunter against his chest again. “This thing has no bones.”
I chuckle. “He’s learning to sit up. Takes time.”
Damian raises an eyebrow. “Tandi says he’s already crawling. I would not call that crawling.”
Hunter lets out a little squeal, kicking his feet against Damian’s stomach and twisting to look at Tyson, wanting to go back on the floor.
Damian looks down at him.