Page 67 of New Beginnings
“Does it say anything else?” I asked.
He flipped through the pages for a few minutes, then sat the journal down on the table, sighing. “She killed him and disposed of the body.”
“What!”
He pinched the bridge of his nose. “It’s all in there. How she did it and how she disposed of the body.”
“Oh my God. J.D., this has to be what he had on her. Did you pack up her most recent journal?”
I hoped he didn’t. I think this was what Agent Revels was holding over Dani’s head. If she documented killing Corey Astor, maybe she documented the blackmail too.
“Yes,” he groaned. “It’s in here somewhere. I just tossed it in a box.”
“Okay. Well, let’s keep digging. It’s in here somewhere.”
Nodding in agreement, he began sifting through yet another box. It had to be devastating searching through all this stuff and being reminded of her especially everything being in her words. Hopefully we find the journal we were looking for and get some answers to some questions so he can finally move on with his life.
CONFESSIONS OF A DEAD WOMAN
J.D. Stevens
This was hard. I didn’t really think about it when I agreed to do it, but then when it finally hit me that I would have to bring all those boxes down and go through them a wave of emotions went through me—sadness, grief, and every emotion in between. I was getting ready to read the words of my wife. Someone I loved beyond comprehension, and it was surreal.
It was a daunting task. I had no idea how many books there were until all the boxes were spread out in my dining room. I’d known Dani kept a journal since she was a kid, but I wasn’t expecting to do this. The one silver lining was that as Siobhan grew older, I could pass down memories of her mother, as her memories of Dani faded away.
Even though I tried to keep her mother alive through pictures and recordings she was so young when Dani passed so it was hard for her to remember. Now I reminded her how much her mother loved her while she was here. I didn’t want her to forgetthat Dani’s world revolved around her and if it was possible for her to be here today, she would be.
I pulled another journal from one of the many boxes and I had a feeling I wouldn’t like what I was going to read. I trusted my wife, but I still didn’t understand why the hell she kept this shit from me. I thought she told me everything. I could admit I was a hypocrite. I kept secrets when it came to club business, but I thought she trusted me more than that.
I took a deep breath and released it, trying to calm my nerves. Of course, Rebel’s eyes were on me. Her presence while I was doing this gave me some comfort, but I really hated not knowing what I was going to read.
I opened the book, and my eyes widen. “Shit.”
“What?” Rebel asked. “What is it? Did you find it?”
“I did. And this is addressed to me.”
“Oh.” Rebel’s hand landed on my shoulder. “I’m going to give you some privacy. I’ll step outside, make some calls, and touch base with my team.”
She didn’t let me respond, she just kissed me on the cheek, and left out of the room. I leaned back in the chair and ran my hand down my face before I started reading.
My love
If you’re reading this, I know you’re pissed as hell at me. And you should be because I know either I’m locked up or dead. I hope it isn’t the latter but either way I’m so sorry for keeping you in the dark about what I’m about to confess to you. I just didn’t know what to do, and I needed to protect you and Siobhan from my past.
I had a pretty fucked up childhood as you know, and it has always been hard to rely on other people when I need help even though I know you would bend over backwards to do so. It’s one of the many things I loveabout you. You’re selfless when it comes to your family, but I need you to know I have to keep you safe. I can’t let my past bite both of us in the ass. I can never live with myself if that happens.
So, I know you’re wondering what’s going on and what I’ve been keeping a secret because I’m pretty sure you’ve already found out that I haven’t been completely honest with you if you’re reading this now.
I hope what I’m about to tell you doesn’t change your view of the person you came to love. But I haven’t always been the girl you fell in love with my heart. Sure, I’m a brat but I did some pretty fucked up things in my past but I’m just going to focus on the one that’s causing havoc in our lives now. Just know if I wanted to stay alive, I had no other choice but to do what I did. So, I hope you understand that back then I ran out of options.
Thankfully I already knew what she had done from the other journal, so her confession wouldn’t shock the hell out of me. I turned the page and continued to read.
So here goes nothing.
I killed someone.
When I was away at school, I dated a guy and I thought he really loved me. Corey Astor. God, it’s so weird even writing his damn name. Just so you know, I’ve tried to wipe his name from everything I’ve ever known. So, I hope you destroy anything where I mention his name if I’m not able to do so.
