Page 10 of Carnal Desire
“He did.”
“Even after you used your safe word to stop all play?” he asks, and I can hear the fury and disbelief in his words.
It’s not normal for someone a part of the BDSM community to ignore the use of a safe word. It’s there for the submissive safety. And if ignored it’s one of the highest betrayals. But it was even more than that for me, it was almost deadly. Now he knows why I need his help if he’s able to guide me through this.
The memory of the cold steel against my skin and the searing pain that covered my entire body with each and every cut flashes through my mind so vividly I can feel the agony of each slice as my skin is torn apart. It’s one of the reasons I don’t like to talk about what happened. I end up having flashbacks.
I close my eyes, trying to push down the terror rising inside me. I try to bury the memory of that day deep down, so I’m not thrown back into the past. But it’s no use.
He runs his calloused hands against my skin causing goosebumps to cover my naked flesh. Normally we use his playroom but this time he insisted we use mine. I don’t question it. I’m just as comfortable in my playroom just like I’m comfortable at his place in his personal playroom.
As he lays me on my massive custom made four poster bed, the red satin sheets brush against my already sensitive skin. The smoothness and the coolness of the fabric contrasts against the roughness and warmth of his hands sending another delicious shiver over my body.
“Oh, my girl likes that,” he whispers, running his hands across my breasts, tweaking my already hardened nipples. I hiss from the pain but groan when his warm mouth encases one of my breasts, sucking my tender peak into his mouth.
I do like it. It feels so fucking good.
He tweaks my nipples again, then his warm rough tongue runs across them causing a moan to emanate from deep within my chest and my pussy to leak more arousal.
“We’re going to try something a little different tonight,” he says, moving up my body.
That gets my attention. Normally if we try anything new, we discuss it before we step in the playroom. We agree or disagree beforehand. That is something we negotiated in our contract. A contract we’ve stuck to religiously for five years.
“You didn’t say anything about trying something new,” I say but he doesn’t respond, he just straddles my hips putting most of his weight on me. Then he grabs my wrists and bounds them together with a silk tie. I pull at the restraints. They’re tight, and I can’t get them loose.
“Christian?”
I call him by his name instead of master just to get his attention because I don’t like the distant look in his eyes. But he doesn’t answer. He reaches in the back pocket of his slacks and removes a knife. He brings the knife closer to my face, flipping it over, so I can get a better look at it.
The smooth gray blade is about four inches long, maybe two inches wide from tip to hilt. He runs the pad of his thumb along the blade, hissing as a line of blood pools on his skin. He runs his tongue across the trail of blood, closing his eyes when he tastes it, his body visibly shaking.
Fuck! This isn’t good.
“You know I don’t like knife play, Christian.” I pull at my restraints and wiggle my body, trying to get him off me. “Angel.”
I use my safe word, hopefully that will snap him out of it, but he says nothing. Nor does he stop the scene like he should. He only holds the knife closer to my face so I can get a better look at it.
Fuck! This isn’t good.
“Angel! Christian! Angel!!” I scream and try to wiggle free.
“Do you know how long I’ve wanted to run my blade along your beautiful brown skin,” he says, ignoring my pleas. “Watch it split open and watch the blood pour from it. Then coat my dick in it, jack off, before licking your skin clean.”
He moans, grabbing the bulge through his slacks.
I’ve known for a while he’s been interested in blood and knife play but it’s something I have no interest in and disagreed with participating in. He agreed to let the subject go.
“It would be so beautiful to see your gorgeous umber skin painted red,” he continues, licking his lips. “Your blood would make it so easy to slide inside your cunt. Can you imagine how good it will feel to sink inside you while you’re covered in your own blood?”
“Christian, please let me go. I don’t want to do this. Angel!”
His expression clouds in anger.
“My other subs have no problem with me doing what I like to them like good little whores. But you… you won’t be the whore that you are and continue to deny me, Cadence. Why do you deny me what is rightfully mine?” He yanks me forward by the collar around my neck causing me to wince. “You are mine! And this proves it. Mine to do with as I please.”
He pushes my head back against the pillow. This Christian I don’t know. Normally, he’s the sweetest person. He cares about me. Now his dark eyes are filled with so much anger, desire, and disgust. I want him to let me go. I want him to get the hell away from me.
“Let me go, now Christian!” I yell, trying to deny the terror taking over me. Trying to portray bravery I don’t have. “I don’t want to do this anymore.”
