Page 90 of The Season
She gives a strangled whimper, and squeezes me tighter.
“Honey. What happened?”
“Hmf hmf umpf whpf liamph ampf amphwan hmf uh pff,” she replies, her voice completely muffled by my shirt.
I grin, peeling back from her just enough so that I can stare down at the top of her head. “What was that? I didn’t quite hear you.”
She looks up at me, her hazel eyes glinting gold in the fluorescent light of the kitchen. “I hooked up with Liam and Antoine in the pool,” she whispers, her lower lip trembling.
Oh.Oh.
Understanding dawns, and I cast a dark look down the hallway to where Liam and Antoine are currently holed up together, oblivious to the rest of the world. Doing… whatever it is they’re doing.
“What?” I growl. “And they’ve just left you on your own?” I make to step away from her, intending to stomp down the hallway and give the pair of them a piece of my mind, but Lily grabs my hand.
“No. No, that’s fine.” She gives me a tremulous smile. “I’m not upset about that.” Her cheeks pinken, her gaze dropping to her bare feet, to her little toenails, painted purple. “They were amazing, actually.”
I feel my shoulders relax, then twine my fingers with her own, loving the feel of her small hand within mine as I tug her over to the sofa. “Okay.” I let out a sigh, and give her what I hope is a reassuring smile. “That’s good.”
Still, my mouth feels dry, like it doesn’t quite want to say those words.Good. It’s good.
I should be happy for her, happy for them. I shouldn’t feel this possessive curl of jealousy in the pit of my stomach.
She slides easily onto the couch next to me, our hands still linked, her thigh pressing against my own as we sink into the worn cushions. I wrap my arm around her shoulders, but resist the urge to pull her onto my lap.
“Tell me what’s going on,” I murmur, pressing a kiss to the top of her damp hair. “Why are you so upset?”
She tucks her feet under her, until her knees are resting over my thigh, and I can’t help but feel a rush of pride at being wanted. At having her practically clinging to my side.
“I can’t do this,” she says, the words tumbling out in a rush. “I can’t drive in the snow. I nearly got us all killed. Honestly, it was awful. I had no idea what I was doing—apparently, you’re not supposed to use the brakes in the snow? Like, how was I supposed to know that? I’m from Hawai’i. I’m barely a real snowboard instructor. I thought I was awesome, you know, getting my instructor’s certificate. But apparently, it’s only good for this mountain—it’s not a real certificate at all.”
Her voice goes tight, her body shuddering against my own as she presses her face into my armpit.
“Hey,” I murmur. “It’s okay. You’re fine. No one got hurt—that’s the main thing. Did you crash the car?”
She shakes her head. “No. It spun to the other side of the road. But we didn’t hit anything.”
“Okay. Good.” I try not to smile. I shouldn’t smile, not when she’s upset, but honestly, I’m just relieved that it’s not anything that serious. That she’s safe, and in my arms. “And youarea real instructor. You worked hard for that exam.”
She gives a derisive snort, reaching up to swipe at her eyes with the back of her hand. “Yah. Maybe.”
I pull back, twisting on the couch beside her and bringing my face level with her own. “You did. Listen to me. You deserve to be here, okay? Just like anyone else. I bet Liam would agree with me.”
Her mouth twists, her hazel eyes flashing with amusement, even as they sparkle with unshed tears. “Well, yah. But he’s probably biased…”
I shake my head. “Nah-uh. No way. Not about snowboarding.” I grin. “Though possibly about you.” I waggle my eyebrows. “So, you hooked up with both of them?”
I know I shouldn’t ask for details. Not just because it’s a complete invasion of her privacy, and theirs, but also because I’m not entirely sure how I feel about all of it. Sure, I’ve always fantasized about being in some sort of polycule relationship, but in my imagination, I was always absolutely certain that I was part of that relationship too. Maybe I was even at the center of it.
Now, with Lily tucked at my side, and Liam and Antoine in the other room, I’m not so sure. Does she just see me as a friend? Someone she can trust and confide in? Would she even think about having something more with me, if that something more didn’t involve sex?
Lily presses her palms to her face, then flops back onto the couch with a groan. “I’m terrible, aren’t I?”
“What? No.” I push down my self-doubt and scramble to face her. “Why would you say that?”
“I’m so selfish,” she says, her hands still over her face.
I shake my head, climbing over her until my body is nearly flush with hers, my elbows on either side of her to keep my weight from squashing her into the cushions. “You’re not selfish. Not at fucking all.”
