Page 57 of Knot Her Cowboys
Fucking Darlene.
The Deckers probably would’ve given up on Riley, accepting we were going to form a pack. They might not have liked it, but they did a lot of work with Wayne, and my oldest brother was a valuable business partner since he had taken over for our dads. Getting an extra connection to us—even if it was withthe bastard daughter of Deckers’ second-in-command and the youngest Harris son—would’ve been a benefit in their eyes. But Darlene would never let her go. I knew that, and so did Riley.
“Help me?”
Cash laughed. “You want me to wingman you on our scent match?”
“I think we can both agree I need it.”
“Not as much as you think you do. She wants to fall right back into the way things were, and, yeah, there’s gotta be some conversations that happen, but she doesn’t want to be weird around you. She’s been so fucking scared to see you because she knows what she did and she hates herself for it. Don’t let her believe that you hate her too.”
My stomach twisted. “I could never hate her. I’ve felt a lot of things about her over the years, but never that.”
“Then go fucking woo her. We all know you want a life with her. That’s going to come with complicated shit and hurt feelings. I’m not telling you to get over what happened, but Iamtelling you it’s never going to get better if you can’t have a conversation with her.”
Ididwant a life with her. And I wanted all of the mess and beauty that came along with that. She was feisty. She had never hesitated to call me on shit, and I’d always returned that favor. We had stubbornly crawled through life together, dragging each other forward whenever one of us stopped having the strength to keep going. Cash and Morgan knew that. We had all dragged each other, surviving as one fucked-up unit, making sure we made up for all the love missing elsewhere.
I buried my face in my hands, taking a slow, deep breath. “I don’t know how to stop being so mad at her.”
Cash clapped a hand onto my shoulder. “I don’t understand everything you’re feeling, but I’m not ignorant. What happened fucking sucks. Nothing’s going to change the past, but I’ll bedamned if I let you lose out on a future with her. She’sscared, Cooper. I feel it in the bond every second. She’s the same beautiful mess that left us and she needs you. Don’t try to pretend you don’t need her too.”
“Wasn’t going to.” I hated the idea of her being scared. She had spent so much of her childhood feeling that way and I despised that it had followed her into her adult life.
“Good. Now get your ass out there and start wooing.”
I let myself be shoved out of the kitchen, finding my pack and Morgan’s in the shade, all hovering around Riley and my sister. They looked so happy.
Cash pushed me forward first, and I let my instincts draw me straight to Riley, looping my hand through hers. She startled at first, offering me a tentative smile and lacing our fingers together. The contact of her skin on mine was a head rush, and I suppressed the urge to drag her away, to force a conversation and get every detail I was missing. She deserved this time with Morgan and I wasn’t going to ruin it.
Cash pressed a thumbs-up against my back, presumably a silent acknowledgment that whatever he felt in the bond was positive.
Riley grinned up at him, accepting a quick kiss as he slipped his arm over her shoulders. I needed her to look atmelike that. I guess I hadn’t done very much to earn it.
Cash seemed to think I could do this. I wasn’t so sure, but maybe the scent match would make things easier. I had to use every weapon at my disposal to carve away the hurt that lingered between us, to build a future Riley might want to be a part of.
She couldn’t leave again.
I wouldn’t survive losing her a second time.
Nerves butted up against relief. If Cooper was holding my hand, he probably didn’t hate me. I wouldn’t blame him if he did, even if I didn’t want to think about that being true. We had so much to talk about.
“Tell me everything about New York,” Morgan insisted.
So I did. About school, the shitty apartments I had barely been able to afford, my favorite places to visit.
Morgan was so bright. Anyone with eyeballs could see she was so fucking happy. Two dogs sat at her feet, a Rottweiler watching her adoringly, and a Chesapeake Bay retriever on a leash, presumably because she kept staring lovingly at the horses and that affection was unlikely to be returned.
Morgan had only been an exhausted, angry teen when I left. Now she was flourishing, with a pack who obviously loved her, living her dream in a cabin in the woods, running a photography and nature tour company with her alphas. Hating alphas had been a pastime for her as a kid. Each of her brothers who presented only seemed to confirm that alphas were assholes from birth. I wish I could’ve been around to see how she’d reacted when Cooper and Cash had presented, throwing that whole assumption out the window. And now she had a whole pack of alphas.
Wonders never ceased.
“Do you think you’ll stick around for a while?” Morgan asked.
“I’ve got nowhere else to be,” I replied casually. Cooper’s fingers twitched in mine. “Plus, Cash is a pretty big ball and chain to drag away if I wanted to leave.”
I hip-checked him playfully, leaning into his chest. I had no plans for anything and I was trying not to worry about that too hard. As nervous as I was about being back in Montana for any length of time, I could at least use these days to start repairing the relationships I’d abandoned.
Blessedly, Morgan seemed as happy to see me as she always had been, and Cash had made everything ten times more comfortable in his uniquely Cash way. I wasn’t thinking too much about forming a proper pack, but I couldn’t deny the temptation was there.
