Page 13 of Knot Her Cowboys
Bruce frowned. “I thought the point of this trip was to spend time together?”
“Don’t you pull that out, mister,” I said with a laugh. “You two are the ones who disappeared to work and came back to the cabin for dinner. You’re allowed to aim zero guilt in my direction. I’m inviting you out to an activity I would like to do, and it’s totally fine if you don’t want to, but you can’t skipeverything.”
He sighed.
Bryan slipped out of bed, adjusting his pajama set so it was totally smooth. “Give us a good-night kiss first, then.”
I stepped into his arms, accepting a sweet kiss from him and then from Bruce. “I’m putting in a formal request for you both to attend the campfire tomorrow night so you have time to emotionally prepare to be outside for a while. And we have a trail ride booked after breakfast. There’s gonna be bugs and trees and horses, so however you have to make your peace with that, do it now.”
“Duly noted,” Bruce said with a nod.
“Have fun with the mosquitoes and don’t stay out too late.” Bryan kissed my cheek.
“Okay, Dad,” I joked. “I’ll be home by eleven.”
I blew them a kiss and slipped back outside into the night. While I was gone, the staff had fixed up one of the picnic tables with drinks and cups, each one labeled with two little signs—one with black ink and the other with glow in the dark paint. One of the staff poured a shot of bourbon into a glass for me upon my request while I got another of lemon water, sitting myself down in the firelight.
“Friends and guests,” Cash announced, “Welcome to the musical portion of your evening. Liquid courage is available if you’re nervous about singing along.”
The staff filled up camp chairs between picnic tables, probably two dozen guitars scattered between everyone. Apparently this was a good place to work if you liked having an audience. Cash had only just been learning guitar in high school, and I’d been privy tomanyterrible performances back in the day, but I was relieved when he strummed that those initial struggles appeared long gone. He picked his way through the opening notes, the other guitars joining in one by one as I caught on to the song. Music filled the evening, the sun quickly disappearing behind the hills to bathe us in the night.
It rocketed me straight back to my childhood, when Cooper and I would drag Morgan off into the woods, huddled around a tiny fire for hours, Cash joining us too once he moved to town. We sang, laughed, and drank well before we were legal, just for the thrill of breaking a rule where no one could see us.
I sipped my bourbon, the sharp burn of it gliding down my throat as strong as I remembered. The people I knew in New York were much more cocktail and wine people, or expensive-as-hell whiskey aged for a billion years. I was just as content sipping liquor-store bourbon out of a plastic cup. Bruce and Bryan had tried to expand my palate, and while I didn’t dislike their fancier choices, I didn’t notice the subtle differences the way they did.
Cash kicked off the evening with a song everyone knew, a classic featuring the Shenandoah River and Blue Ridge Mountains, even though we were a couple thousand miles away from there. I sang along, losing the rust of disuse on my singing voice with every sip of bourbon.
As we crept into the later hours, the songs switched from vibrant sing-alongs to quieter solo performances. The staff all took turns with lush ballads and folk songs. Dakota even treated us to an indigenous folk tale through song, the smooth timbre of his voice almost making me cry as he carried us through the full range of emotion.
Cooper’d had a nice voice back in the day, at least after puberty had stopped making it crack. Campfire songs had been so much fun when we’d sneak away. Did he sound different today? I could only imagine he would now that he’d fully grown into his body.
I should write him a letter before I go, but what would I say?I’m sorry I was a huge chickenshit who wasn’t brave enough to come home, and now I’m moving abroad with my alphas? I cringed internally. Thinking about Cooper was dangerous territory. If he’d been around during college, Bryan and Bruce wouldn’t have had a snowball’s chance in hell of me looking in their direction. I should saysomething, though. Right? That seemed like a fair and reasonable thing to do, even if it was only an apology for all the years I’d let fall between us.
Cash was here now, and if I visited Morgan, either of them could pass along a message. It was the coward’s way out, I knew that, but I was absolutely certain that if I saw hatred in Cooper’s eyes, I would never recover. Selfish as it was, I wanted to keep the sweet boy I remembered preserved in my head, with his gaze full of love just for me.
Cash rounded us off for the night with a soft, sweet number about lost love and second chances. “All right, Rowdy Rock, it’s time for you to get to bed. You’re welcome to stay out for a while longer, but I will remind you breakfast is served bright and early.”
I stayed right where I was while the other guests took themselves back to their cabins, and the staff trickled away, until I was left with just Cash, Dakota and Levi, while I watched the crackling flames.
“You don’t have to babysit me. I just wanted to sit with the quiet for a bit.”
“Then I’ll sit in the quiet with you,” Cash said, settling next to me.
I tipped my head back, soaking it all in. Only the brightest stars were visible in New York, but out here they covered every speck of sky, like crushed diamonds scattered over black velvet.
I probably wouldn’t get this in Berlin either. How many people around the world lived without the stars? They didn’t even know what they were missing.
Crickets serenaded us now that they weren’t drowned out anymore.
“You guys were really good tonight.”
Cash beamed at me. “Hell of a lot better than the last time you heard me play, right?”
“Thankfully,” I said with a laugh. I figured staring at the stars was safer than looking at any of the beautiful men surrounding me. My alphas were waiting for me. I knew I should move, but I was tempted to stretch out on top of one of the picnic tables and fall asleep under the sky. “Do you need my help with breakfast?”
“Only if you want to,” replied Cash. “We go pretty simple with an oatmeal station, bacon, and fruit. Dakota is on breakfast duty.”
“I’ll come help. What time?”
