Page 230 of The Gods Veiling
These are cleansing and crippling.
There’s a weight lifting off my chest, yet I’m bubbling with humiliation, and I hate that I’m allowing myself to break like this.
I release a deep breath when the stream of tears slows. It’s almost loud enough to cover the sound of a limb cracking.
My head jerks and my eyes lock on the one person I really could’ve done with not seeing for a while. At least until all my embarrassment from today was washed away.
“It looks like my angel’s wings have been clipped.”
I can’t force words out of my mouth as Riven slowly strolls to the edge of the hot spring. He doesn’t stop walking as he takes one stone step at a time down. I didn’t even know those were there.
The water cascades around his hips as he finally falls still and cocks his head at me.
“Why are you here?” I ask through a closed throat.
“I could ask you the same. This is my hiding spot.”
“How long have you been hiding here?”
“Twenty years.”
His answer throws me for a loop at first until I realize he means since he and his brothers were brought to the Godsdawn.
“I meant tonight.”
“I just got here.”
Silence fills the feet separating us until he chuckles and I squeeze my fists.
“I can’t do this, Riven. Not tonight, please.”
“You can’t do what, little burden? Enjoy my company?”
“Yes…that. This place has taken too much out of me tonight.”
“Oh, it hasn’t taken anything. Its power knows what needs to be healed, whether it’s body, mind, or soul. You just feel worn out because you bottle it all up all the time.”
“You’re one to call someone out.”
“I never said I didn’t do that. How do you think I know what you’re feeling?”
It’s my turn to cock my head at him. “Is that why you come here?”
“Nosy little thing.”
My lids slam shut and unfortunately the motion forces the water that was still gathered in my eyes to fall. It takes every drop of pride in me to keep from wiping them away.
I will not let him embarrass me in this moment.
“Yes, I come here to release it all. The thoughts and feelings that run through me are better spoken to a hot spring that can’t judge me rather than beings with ears and opinions that can.”
My gaze collides with his at his omission. “I wouldn’t judge you.”
“You just did a moment ago. The second you saw me, your first thought was you couldn’t be bothered to deal with my eccentricity. My chaos isn’t even at the helm right now.”
My lips part and shame sears across my chest. I’m very guilty of constantly assuming Riven’s going to do something to piss me off. His chaotic side is always more present than the other, so I expect it.
There have been very few moments that’ve given me an opportunity to see a more serious side of him. Even then, he’s unreliable when it comes to expressinghis true feelings about me being his Binder, our situation, and anything else going on. He keeps me in a state of confusion I really don’t have the energy for right now.
