Page 171 of Gift from the Source
“Do you all think my soul’s been tainted?” Willow’s soft and sweet whisper penetrates the silence.
The question pierces my heart.
“No,” I say darkly.
“Even though—”
“I said no. Nothing is wrong with your soul, Primary.”
“How do you know?” she asks quietly.
“Because it lives alongside my own. My brothers’. We would know. I swear it on my life, your soul is just as good, if not stronger, than it was before this happened.” I lower my voice and run my finger down her cheek.
It’s not my fear speaking or the need to reassure her.
It’s the truth.
The longer I sit here with her, my brothers, the unease within me settles around the warmth her light gives off inside of me. It’s burning bright just as it always does.
My own soul is desperate for it. It clings to that piece of her.
My Primary is fine and will continue to be.
“This is so shallow and meaningless right now, but this is where my mind is going, so don’t judge me too harshly for my next question.”
“Ask whatever you want, princess,” Corentin says.
He hasn’t lifted his hand from her heart since we got her comfortable between us. He’s allowed the faint halo of light to stay surrounding him rather than shoving it back in a cage. We’ve all let our gifts out just so they could be near her.
She isn’t drained. Not in a magical sense anyways. I’ve already made the dragon check multiple times and he swears she’s completely topped off with her own from closing the portals.
It’s mentally how she’s doing that I’m worried about.
“Will we be able to get the blood and whatever that…black stuff is out of my gown? I knew I’d have to take it apart at least somewhat to get it off, but I was hoping to not have to destroy it. It’s ruined now, though,” she says, blowing out a harsh breath that makes her lips flap together.
She picks up a piece of the material and sort of tosses it in the air, sighing in disappointment about how it’s covered in mess.
Yes. Her mental state is most certainly what I’m worried about.
“You thought that really loud,” she says, whipping her head in my direction, and I internally scold myself.
“Given the circumstances, I’m sure you can understand where I’m coming from, Primary.”
Her raised brow smooths out as her eyes soften. That understanding look in her gaze does make my worry ease a bit. She wasn’t trying to bury this down by making a silly comment about her dress. She just doesn’t know what to say.
“That was…I don’t even know a word to describe it. I can’t sit here and lie to you all and say that I’m fine with what just happened because I’m not. And despite you all trying to hide it from me right now, I know it affected you as well. But at the end of the day, it is just something else that we’re going to have to take time to heal from. That process can start now, but it’s not going to happen tonight or tomorrow. We don’t have the luxury of taking a break and processing it any more than we are right now.
“What’s getting to me the most, especially mentally, is that was a slap in the face about what we’re really facing. That was only half the power that he’s stolen. He still has whatever he’s taken in the other Binding. It also raises the question for me of how in the hell is he functioning? Is it different for him because of the ritual he’s doing or has he just become one with this power now?
“With everything aligning the way it has been lately, I really thought that this was going to be—I don’t know. Simple isn’t the word. Obviously, I knew this would be hard. Now, though, it feels impossible. I was confident up until now that we were on the right path. Hell, now I don’t even know if we’re even close to the path we’re supposed to be on. Where do we go from here? How do we prepare for this?”
Her words send us into silence again. There’s nothing we can say to disagree with her or really even make her feel better.
We all feel the same way.
No, we didn’t experience that the way she did, but we did experience what we could be up against. Maybe the power called so strongly to me because it was her wielding it.
That possibility is very likely, but that also begs the question, what will it feel like fighting against it with ill intentions? My motive a minute ago was getting through to the love of my life.
