Page 57 of Prideful Union
“So … you fucked him right after your husband was in the ground?” Luca snaps.
“Luca!” This time, it’s my turn to scold him.
He scowls, sinking into his seat.
Mom flinches at the question. “No. That didn’t happen.”
“Then, what?” Luca demands, crossing his arms. “Are you telling me you’re the virgin Mary, Mom? And Franco was Joseph? And Lucia and me are Jesus? Because I think that’s a little too religious, even for you.”
“Can you just stop?” Mom snaps at him. “I’m trying to tell you something serious. It’s been hard. I haven’t wanted to say it because I don’t want you two to be upset by this.”
“Upset by what?” I ask.
She shakes her head. “I can’t.”
“Giulia.” Santino’s low voice cuts through the room. “Tell them.”
She whips her head toward him. “You know?”
He sighs, nodding. “Antonio accidently told me.”
I stare at Santino for a moment. So, hewaskeeping from me. Something big. I thought we were past this. That we’d started anew. And yet, he’s still keeping secrets from me.
“Mom, just tell us,” Luca says.
“He raped me,” she whispers.
My entire body goes still.
It’s Luca who speaks next. “What? Did you just say … Uncle Francorapedyou?”
She squeezes her eyes shut. “Yes. He was waiting to hurt me the moment Riccardo died. He hurt me that first night he moved in, and he continued to do it every night for a long time after. I made sure to keep his attention on me so he couldn’t hurt your siblings. And then …” She takes in a shaky breath. “I found out I was pregnant with you two. I knew you weren’t Riccardo’s. He’d been too sick from being poisoned by Franco. I never told you because I felt shame for a long time. And then I felt like I needed to protect you two from the truth.”
“Why?” Luca asks in a quiet voice.
“Oh, honey,” she says, looking at him with sad eyes. “No one wants to know they were the product of rape and not love.”
It’s like a dam breaks within me. “Oh my god.” I get up from my seat and leave the room.
“I’ll check on her,” Santino says as he follows me into the hallway. “Lucia?”
“You knew!” I smack his chest. “You knew, and you kept this from me.”
“Because it wasn’t my story to tell. It was your mother’s.”
“I know that. But you still learned about it before I did. How is that ok? I was born out of rape, Santino. How can I ever be okwith that?” I cross my arms around myself. “Wait. Is that why you tried pushing me away during sex? Because of this?”
He’s quiet for a moment. Then, “Yes.”
“Oh,” I moan sadly. “You knew. You thought you could dictate everything between us. Because you knew a truth about me that I deserved to know, but you found out first.”
“Are you angry with me?”
“Of course, I am! I thought we had a new beginning, Santino.”
“We do.”
“No. You’ve done nothing but lie to me this entire time! You went behind my back to find out about Franco. You found out the truth about the … rape. And you never told me a damn thing! You took away my autotomy for goodness’ sake. I’m so fucking angry with you!”
