Page 35 of The Dating Ban
Because, if I’m really honest… it felt good. Not in aWow, I’ve found my life’s callingway, but in aHuh, maybe I don’t completely suck at following throughway.
I huff. “I hate how well you know me.”
She chuckles but then tilts her head slightly. “And this whole experience… you did it entirely on your own?”
“Yep,” I say quickly.
Pee-Pee just looks at me. I shift under her gaze, suddenly feeling like a teenager caught sneaking in past curfew.
One eyebrow lifts. “Who is that Theo you mentioned?”
I wave a dismissive hand. “I may have attended one class with him and his Lucy… I mean, his daughter, first, just to get a feel for it.” There is no reply from Pee-Pee. Clearly, she wants more. I clear my throat. “He owns the café underneath my flat and we got talking and he told me about this yoga class. On Mondays. But that’s not relevant.”
“Of course not,” she says smoothly. “Completely irrelevant.”
I narrow my eyes. “I don’t like your tone.”
She just smiles. “So, tell me more about this entirely irrelevant Theo.”
“You’re making this a thing, and it’s really not a thing.”
“I’m simply asking about the entirely unremarkable Theo.”
I groan, letting my head fall back against the sofa. “He’s just this guy. A single dad. He had the weird idea to open a Viennese coffee shop. We met by coincidence, and now, somehow, I’ve been recruited into his daughter’s yoga routine.”
Pee-Pee nods, her expression unreadable. “And you’re just… friends?”
“Yes,” I say, sitting up a little straighter. “We are just friends.”
“And why would that be a problem?”
“It’s not a problem.”
Pee-Pee just waits. I fidget.
“I just… I don’t know. I don’t want to fall into old patterns.”
She nods. “And what would that look like?”
“You know, getting too comfortable, prioritising someone else’s presence over figuring out what I actually want.This whole thing is about focusing on myself, and if I let someone in too much, I might not do that.”
Pee-Pee considers my reply. “That’s fair. But does being his friend mean you’re abandoning yourself?”
I hesitate. “Not… necessarily.”
She leans forward slightly. “So then, what would it take for you to feel secure in the friendship? What boundaries would you need?”
I chew on my lip. “I guess… I’d need to make sure I’m still making decisions for me. Not changing my plans just to fit around his. And I’d need to be honest with myself if I ever started feeling like I was slipping into something more.”
Pee-Pee nods. “That sounds reasonable.”
I exhale, some of the tension easing out of my shoulders. “Okay. But how do I know the difference? Like, if I help out with Lucy sometimes, am I just being a good friend, or am I subconsciously moulding myself into whatever he needs?”
Phyllis nods slowly, pausing as if contemplating what best to say. Although I’m pretty sure she knows exactly what to say. That woman has an answer to everything.
“That’s a really good question. What do you think the difference is?”I thought I pay her to give me the answers?
I frown. “I guess… if I actually want to do it, that’s one thing. But if I feel like I have to, or like saying no would disappoint him, then maybe that’s a red flag?”
