Page 91 of When It Reins
“I just want him here.”
“I know. So do I.” Logan turns, giving me his full attention when Colter wanders over to Thea, and she picks him up with a big smile. “Mitch has been through more than we ever knew, and I know we have you to thank for encouraging him to come to us.”
“I didn’t do anything,” I claim, shaking my head.
“You did. Mitch told me he went to you first with what happened, and that you told him sharing with us would help him, would help our relationship.” Logan shakes his head, and I realize then how much this guy carries on his shoulders. He carries the weight of the world in worry. He has so many people to care for that he probably doesn’t even have time to worry about himself.
“For years, I felt like Mitch put a wedge between us, and I never knew why. I thought maybe it had something to do withme putting all of my focus on Luella for so long, for putting her first.” He shakes his head, and I focus on the creasing at the edge of his eyes. “I should have known there was something more there, something that he was keeping close to the chest. But my focus was so divided that I didn’t think to push him. Maybe if I wasn’t so busy back when he left, I could have known something was up.
“But the fact of the matter is, Mitch would have done what he did, even if I’d known about it.” Logan sighs, a hint of a smile on his face. “Protecting those he loves is what he does. It’s who he is. One of the greatest gifts you can give him is to let him do it.”
“It’s not easy,” I reply, letting out a deep breath.
“I know it’s not. You think I’m not married to a protector myself?” He smirks and tilts his head. I glance at my big sister and consider that for a moment. He’s right. She is. All she ever did until she had her own family was worry about me and my sisters. Now she has her own family to worry about, but I know she still keeps close tabs on us girls as well. “It’s not for the faint of heart, being with someone who will take on all that burden and put up walls to keep us out.”
I glance back at him. “She still does that to you?”
“Yeah, at times.” He shrugs. “I just have to keep my hammer handy.” Logan smiles at me and says, “It’s worth it. Every time she tries to take control of a situation, every time she tries to keep me out, I’m there, ready to break down those walls. I have to show her I’m there for her, even when she feels she needs to do things on her own.”
“She lets you?”
“Well, you know your sister as well as I do, June. She’s stubborn. She doesn’t want to burden anyone with her feelings or her problems. Hell, we’ve been married a few years now, and I still have to sit her down and tell her that’s what I’m here for.”
“So, what do you do when you feel blocked out?” I feel my nose sting with tears, and I swallow to try to keep them at bay. “How do you know when they’re protecting you versus pushing you away?”
Logan looks at me for a moment before saying, “Your love for the person you’re with can’t be conditional. We know these people we love have flaws. I know I have flaws, but Thea loves me in spite of them. I know Mitch has flaws, June. I know he’s got a long way to go to realize that what you need most is him by your side, but I can see it all over your face how much you love him, and I know that you’ll wait for him to get there.”
A tear slides down my cheek, and I swipe it away, keeping my attention on him.
“I know it feels like Mitch is holding you back, but he’s just keeping you safe. I guarantee, once this asshole is out of the picture, he’ll be glued to your side.”
“What happens if he gets hurt, or worse, trying to get him, though? That’s where I’m worried, Logan. I love your brother. He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and I have no intention of letting that go, but if something bad happens, I’ll have to.”
I’m embarrassed by the number of tears that are falling down my cheeks, and I know the rest of the room is probably watching me, but Logan grabs my hand and squeezes tightly, looking at me with an intensity that should frighten me.
“Not everyone you love is going to leave you, June. I know you and your sisters lost your parents, and that’s awful. I’m so sorry that happened to you, but Mitch is not your parents. He’ll keep himself safe because he loves you so damn much.”
I inhale a breath and try to control my emotions, but it’s pointless now. I feel someone take the mug from my hands, and Annmarie sits next to me on the couch, wrapping an arm around my shoulders and hugging me tightly.
“He’s gonna be okay, Junie,” Annmarie says. “Mitch is strong and so smart. He’ll keep everyone there safe, including himself.”
I have a flash, a memory of that glass shattering, and then the explosion. It all happened so quickly, but from an outsider’s perspective, maybe they think they would have gotten away from it, out of the house before it exploded.
My worry is that Mitch won’t get out in time.
43
mitch
The barn isnice and quiet.
Save for the shuffling of horses and the chomp of hay, it is a peaceful night on the ranch. Crickets chirp and owls hoot, and it is practically a farm bedtime story out here. I sit with my back against the wall inside an empty stall with three other people, including Cal Trevors.
We didn’t mean for him to get involved, but it isn’t every day a motorcycle club shows up on your front lawn to help keep your ranch safe.
I know he’s coming here.
I can feel it in my bones that this is going to be his next hit, that he is closing in on what is most important to me.
