Page 32 of Ruin
Children often grow up mirroring their upbringing or rebelling against it entirely. If Kolton were to have children, I’m confident he’d treat them with nothing but respect. He’d make sure they had everything they needed, and though communication is sometimes hard for him, I know he’d figure it out. He’d make sure his children were heard and understood. He has a huge heart and he cares so much—he just doesn’t know what to do with all his feelings.
I’ve spent some of my time looking over what he’s been up to these last years. He came into the Treasurer position in the club, and not only does he handle all their money, but he runs every charity event they have. All of them go toward something the town needs, mostly things for the school or families in need.
Kolton may pretend like he has no heart, he may pretend that he’s made of ice, but it’s bullshit. Maybe I’m the only person who knows that, and that’s why it’s even more important for him to let me back into his life.
When I left Kolton waiting for me that night, I left my heart with him. I’m just not sure he’s aware of that—or maybe he doesn’t care.
I’ve loved Kolton for a very long time. All it took was a kiss from him to see that I hadn’t been living at all. And the more he gave me, the more I started resenting my own life. It didn’t matter that I had millions, a perfect wife, and an amazing son—though, I never would give up my son, not for anything. He is the reason I could never change my life, even if I wanted to. The love I have for my son is so different and so pure. I’d never do anything to change what I had with him.
But Kolton and I… we deserved so much more than we got.
We never got to a point where we could talk about Luke, and how we would navigate a relationship while my son is the same age as him. Now, it’s unfortunately something we will never have to worry about.
I drop into my desk chair, scooting in behind the desk that once belonged to my father. My laptop is open, the screen on and showing the power point presentation I’m working on.
It’s not the first one I’ve done, and I’ve gotten rather good at working in the program, though I don’t find it user-friendly. But after years of doing the same presentation over and over again, it’s time for something new. And so I found a new topic to discuss. Something that would be easier to write if only Kolton would give me the time of day. It’s hard to focus when he’s so close yet worlds away.
Still, my fingers hover over the keyboard as I write down key points.
•Be present.
•Be open.
•Be honest.
Side Note: things will be difficult, but as long as you truly want what you have, you will make it work.
Life isn’t easy. I’ve learned that not only in my own life, but in all the lives I’ve seen along the way. I never wanted to be a public speaker, but after you’ve gone through what I have, you learn that you can’t always be selfish. Sometimes you have to put your own shit aside to help others. And if there’s anything that Kolton can understand, it’ll be that.
Chapter Fourteen
Kolton
“You’re sure about this?” I ask, hovering over Noah, who’s got the office desk covered in stacks of invoices, bank reports, and receipts.
“Absolutely.” He nods. “I’ve been here long enough to see the day-to-day in this place, and even on its busiest day, it’s not bringing in more than twenty-five hundred.” Shaking his head, he grabs a bank receipt, pointing to it. “There is no way in fuck he was depositing thirty grand on a weekly basis. I don’t even think this place is capable of that with the capacity and food prices. Maybe if we double the meal costs, but even then, business would slow down.”
I grab the receipt from him, and see where it says close to thirty grand was deposited. On the line reserved for a note, it gives dates for one full week. I grab a few others, flipping through them too. All are roughly the same, which is a red flag in itself. The place never had a bad week? Holidays weren’t worse or better? Doesn’t make sense.
“And no one has come by?” I ask.
“Nope. And I’m here every day.”
“So either Norman told them what happened or they’re watching the place. Either way, Norman is a dead man.”
Noah huffs out a laugh. “Yeah, likely.” He looks up at me. “So what do we do?”
“That all depends,” I say carefully, putting the receipts back on the pile on the desk where they were so he doesn’t lose them. “On who he was working for.”
“I don’t follow.”
“You don’t need to,” I say. “Make copies of everything here and bring them to the clubhouse. Don’t let anyone see you do it.”
“You think someone will try to take this shit?”
“I think people do things when they’re desperate. They know we’re bound to catch on at some point, and they may want to cover their tracks more. Best we get a one-up on them before that happens.”
“Got it. I’ll have it all over there in a couple hours.”
