Page 31 of Heartfelt Pain
Roma: I’ve been a good boy. I deserve a prize, Ren.
And he thinks his prize should be me. Even if I told him to jerk himself off, he’d want another reward for waiting so long. I’ve walked right into this trap.
Before I can think of a way to walk myself out of said trap my phone rings.
“H-hello?” I clear my voice, sitting up.
Isolde’s thick accent fills my ears. “I’m outside.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know.” A car horn honks in the background. I’m reminded there’s a whole world outside my quiet apartment. “I was walking around and came down this way. You want to hang out?”
“Okay.” The reply comes automatically, not because I’m desperate for a distraction. If anything, I need to clean myself up a bit before I go down to meet Isolde. She does this, just showing up. I don’t think she likes being alone in her apartment and something in her voice has me reacting.
“Give me a sec,” I tell her. “Unless you want to come in.”
“Nah, it’s fine,” she says. “I’m going to get a coffee. You want something?”
“Yes, please. Oh, and a chocolate croissant!”The cafe across the street is my favorite thing about living in this building.
We don’t discuss payment. Our love language is buying each other little treats and there’s no running tally.
Rushing to the bathroom, I hop into a pair of jeans. Wearing sneakers will forever remind me of my best friend Len. I grab a lightweight coat, unsure of what spring weather I might encounter.
Isolde presents me with an iced vanilla latte and my pastry.
“Thank you.” It hits me then that I didn’t eat lunch. “What have you been up to?”
We follow a stream of people. Sunday evening is settling over the city. People enjoy the final few hours before they’re smothered by the corporate work week.
Swerving around a lady holding a giant shopping bag, I ask, “You going to tell me what happened last night?”
She waggles her brows. “Are you?”
Her smirk deepens when my face flushes. If only she knew why I’m really embarrassed. I let her think I got naughty with some random person. I can’t imagine the judgment I’d receive if I told her the truth. That I hooked up with Roma of all people.
Isolde is a gem. She’s loving and loyal. Deep down I know she’d take the time to listen and offer advice. She met me after I’d already transformed into the Ren Callahan everyone knows and fears.
After a night of drinking saki at Fujimori’s I told her the entire story. How Roma’s dad, Lev, sent him to catfish me. How he wanted Cliff, my cousin to take over the business. How I ended up shooting my cousin when I found out he’d worked with the Zimins to fuck me over.
She knows I hate Roma. It needs to stay like that.
“I’m really sorry.” Isolde’s accent drags the syllables down. Her apology is sincere. “I didn’t want to leave you hanging.”
I lick chocolate off my lips. “Tyler called us codependent.”
She blinks. “Oh, he was there.”
“Did you see the Ghost last night?”
She shakes her head before lifting her latte to her mouth. “Nah.”
Humming under my breath, I decide to hold my questions back. The truth is, I have a lot of contacts in this city. But the Ghost avoids most society. My only connection to the man is Isolde and even then it’s tenuous.
“So where are we headed?” I ask. Isolde will go for walks with nothing in mind. “Oh, let’s go in there.”
It’s a cute little stationery shop. I come back out with a bag full of pens and notebooks.
