Page 68 of Until Tomorrow
LOGAN: Most men do. I can agree with that.
Mensucked.Thatwasthe theme of the night. I sat in the country bar at one of the smaller tables alone. Rhett wasn’t playing, but I’d known that. I wanted to try the bar out for myself—no interruptions. I drank beer for the first time since college. It was still as awful now as it was back then, but the nostalgia was there. I liked that part a lot.
The band playing wasn’t nearly as good as Rhett’s, but they were lively and fun. The lead singer didn’t have his passion, but he knew how to get the crowd going. I swayed and wiggled in my spot as the beer made my head a little buzzy. While I did, I keptTumbleopen in front of me and swiped through profiles.
More conversations.
More dick pictures.
More wasted time.
Why was this the standard of dating? No wonder more and more women refused to date. It wasn’t worth trying to weed through the scourge of the earth to meet a halfway decent guy.
“Are you cheating on me with this half-rate band, spark plug?”
I froze at the sound of Rhett’s voice. Tipping my head back slowly, I found him leaning against the back of my booth. He smiled, and damn it. The beer made him even more handsome—not that he had much of an issue in that department.
I shoved those thoughts aside. Dating wasn’t a thing with him.
“Why,” I began in frustration, “does your kind insist on sending unwanted dick pictures?”
That was the question of the century. Good God.
Rhett made a small sound as he considered my question.
“Well, there’s one of two reasons we do that. The first is we know we don’t have much going on for us, and we’re hoping that our big dicks will impress you enough into giving us a fucking chance,” he said.
“And the second thing?” I prompted when he didn’t continue.
“We’re fucking hoping you’ll be horny enough to just fall on it,” he finished, and I scoffed. “I don’t make the rules, spark plug. I just tell it how it is.”
He shrugged as if it was the most casual thing to share. Maybe it was. I wouldn’t know. I had no clue.
“It’s still ridiculous,” I told him.
“Are you collecting dick pictures?”
“Unwillingly.”
“Give me.” Rhett gestured for my phone.Oh, why not?I opened the app back up and set it on the table. Leaning over the table, he scrolled through my messages. I never deleted the guys who sent their dicks to me. I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to do. “Jesus fuck, spark plug. That’s a whole lot of dick. At this point, it’s only right to start rating them back.”
“What?” I laughed.
“First, we’re getting more beer,” he replied. “And then we’re going to piss some inappropriate men off.”
Wasthis my best idea? Probably not.But oh well.It was entertaining.
With fresh beers on our table, I expected him to sit across from me, but he didn’t. Instead, he slid into the booth next to me and nudged me over with his knee. I scooted, but the booth was small, making the situation far more cozy than it should’ve been. The subtle aroma of citrus and coconut did nothing to help my urge to lean into him.
“So, here’s what we’re doing,” Rhett said. “We’re going to say some brutally honest shit about their dicks, and then we’re disconnecting the conversation. They can still see the shitty things we say, but they can’t access your profile when they get mad.”
“Seems like a fair plan.”
“Let’s start with…alpha-man-forty-five.Why the fuck would you connect with some idiot who puts alpha in his goddamn username?” he demanded. “Spark plug, do better.”
“For your information, he said he liked photography!” I exclaimed.
“Means he likes watching porn and looking up naked photos of women,” he retorted.
