Page 94 of A Touch of Charm
His eyes narrowed, and Thea entered his small but neat room, shutting the door behind her. An overstuffed bookshelf leaned against the wall, with a desk, lamp, wash basin, and bed. But what Thea noticed was that the scent of Andre was amplified in this room. This was him, raw and unkempt in simple beige breeches and a white linen shirt.
“I’ve been looking for you at Cloverdale House, and you didn’t return.”
“I can’t be with you, Thea. I’d drag you down.” His voice sounded unconvinced and sad, as if he were forcing himself to speak to them.
“That’s not true. Everything I know about tells me you would only lift me up.”
He dropped his head and avoided her gaze.
Thea’s heart leaped at the sight of this firm, tall, and ruggedly handsome man with the manners and breeding of a prince but the golden hands of the doctor. “You’re too humble.”
She crinkled her nose. “It doesn’t suit you.”
At that, he met her gaze. “Humility has nothing to do with insufficiency. I wish I were enough for you, but I can’t ever be. And now that you know why, I can bear the loss. I knew I couldn’t have you, but losing you hurts even more.”
She knew what he meant, of course. Although he was born an illegitimate child, his parents married and gave birth to his siblings after that. By blood, he was a Habsburg. He could just never be legitimized.
“Let me ask you this. If I told you that my parents had me out of wedlock, would you feel differently about me?” Thea asked.
He swept toward her, put his arms on her shoulders, and let them rise slowly to her cheeks until he cupped her face and drew her closer. “Nothing in the world, especially no trifles like society’s rules and technicalities, could ever affect how deeply and fiercely I love you, Thea.”
“That’s exactly how I feel.”
He exhaled, and his hands melted off her. Then he took a step back. “Thea, this is different. You’re a princess. A princess! I’m nothing.”
Enough was enough.
“First of all, I may be a princess, but that doesn’t mean that all the men in my life, my father, my brothers, and now you have the right to tell me what to think, do, and feel. I love you and don’t need anybody’s permission but yours to show it.”
“Show it?”
She had his attention again.
Good!
“Second, I am supposed to become a Habsburg, and besides your sister Anna, you’re the only one I’ve ever met—and I know most of them personally or by reputation—who has a beating human heart inside that rock-hard ribcage of yours.”
“Ribs are bones; they’re supposed to be hard.”
“Well, the ribs, maybe, but everything about you is just so… so…” She sucked in the air between her lips and then bit her lower lip. “Hard.”
“Hard? Yes, so hard, difficult, Thea.” He took a step back and almost reached the door with his back. “But it shouldn’t be so difficult.”
“It’s not difficult at all.”
“Yes, it is! I can’t stop thinking about it, and no matter how I look at it, there’s no angle here that I can use to set things right.”
“I’m not a dislocated shoulder, Andre; this is my life. And my heart.”
“And I won’t break it.”
“Then you have no choice but to be with me.”
He blew out the air. “Thea—”
“I mean it.”
“It’s too difficult.” His protest sounded even less convincing now, yet he seemed to resist her with all his might.
