Page 82 of The Scent of Intuition
She glanced around, seeking solace in the familiar faces of friends and loved ones. Wendy stood nearby, dabbing at her eyes with a delicate lace handkerchief, her face soft with empathy and shared joy for her brother’s bliss. On either side of Wendy stood Felix and Andre, their expressions solemn yet touched by the moment’s significance. Felix’s arm was comforting Wendy as she hooked hers into his, while Andre held his hands clasped in front of him, a small smile playing at the corners of his mouth.
Only Alfie stood apart, a solitary figure, his posture rigid and unyielding just like in the carriage the previous night. He faced Bea, his eyes locked onto hers with an intensity that both shattered her and held her together. The distance between them felt insurmountable, a space filled with all the words left unsaid. The sight of him standing there, alone and silent, amplified the pain in her chest until it was nearly unbearable.
Alfie’s presence was a silent echo of the turmoil within Bea. As the ceremony began and the vows were spoken, the world seemed to hold its breath, captivated by the profound declarations of love and commitment. Bea struggled to maintain her composure, the beauty of the moment only heightening her inner turmoil. She glanced toward the guests and suddenly had to blink.Oh no!She looked again.It couldn’t be.But it was true, she saw her parents amid the sea of faces.
When they arrived home, the servants must have told them about Pippa’s wedding, and they’d rushed—just in time, she was sure they told one another—to see it. To see her. Their sudden appearance after three long years felt like a fresh wound, reminding her of how far she still had to go to find her own happiness.
The gasps, then thunderous applause, that followed the couple’s kiss was a chorus of joy that resonated through the garden and beyond. When Pippa and Nick kissed, Bea caught Alfie’s eyes, and what she saw there was pain.
Her parents looming in the rows of guests meant her time was up. The world around her continued to celebrate, but inside, her heart ached with unresolved longing and new uncertainties brought by their unexpected arrival.
Bea allowed herself to fully feel the weight of the moment, each tear that fell a testament to the torrent of emotions coursing through her. She wanted to reach out, to bridge the gap between her and Alfie, but something held her back—perhapsit was pride, perhaps fear. Instead, she stood there, amidst the sea of joy and celebration, feeling as though her world was crumbling. They’d caught her at a wedding ceremony that wasn’t her own and she was nowhere near the goal they’d set for her.
After Pippa and Nick sealed their vows with a kiss, the garden erupted in applause once more. Bea clapped along, but her heart wasn’t in it. She could see the happiness on everyone’s faces, yet her own sorrow painted everything in the gray shades of despair. When she met her mother’s gaze at the edge of the crowd, her heart sank even further. Her parents had arrived just when she felt most vulnerable and farthest from achieving her dreams.
The juxtaposition of the joyous wedding and her internal turmoil was almost too much to bear. Bea tried to steady herself, to focus on the happiness of the occasion, but the presence of her parents and the unresolved tension with Alfie weighed heavily on her soul. She stood there, feeling both part of and apart from the celebration, as the world around her continued to move forward, leaving her to navigate the labyrinth of her own emotions.
She turned her eyes to the sea of wedding guests, seeking distraction, and then she saw them—a sudden bustle at the edge of the crowd. Her parents were coming toward her. Bea’s breath caught in her throat. She hadn’t seen them in three years, and there they were, looking exactly as she remembered though perhaps a bit older. Her mother’s hair was still neatly pinned as always, and her father’s stern yet loving gaze scanned the gathering as if he was in charge. They were here, at Pippa’s and Nick’s wedding, but all Bea could think about was how far she felt from finding her own happiness and how much she’d surely disappoint her parents.
A wave of panic surged through her. She wasn’t ready for this reunion, not now, when she felt so broken and vulnerable. She tried to steady herself, to push back the tears that threatenedto spill over. The joyful celebration around her felt like a cruel contrast to the turmoil inside her heart.
She ran.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Alfie stood rigid,his eyes fixed on Bea as she watched Pippa and Nick accept a flurry of well wishes as the crowd came to congratulate them. He could see how her shoulders trembled slightly and how her hands clutched each other as if she were holding herself together by sheer willpower. The sun cast a golden halo around her, illuminating the tears that glistened on her cheeks like diamonds. His heart twisted painfully in his chest. He wanted nothing more than to reach out, to offer some solace, but something held him back—a barrier constructed of society’s rules and ranks imposed upon people.
He knew it meant nothing because all people were ultimately made of flesh and blood and yet he didn’t want to ruin her chances for success in Society by making a claim. If there was anything Alfie respected, it was the future and her independence.
Among the guests and his closest friends, he couldn’t act on his desire. He was painfully aware that he was too far below her station. The world wouldn’t let him have her, he was just an apothecary and didn’t deserve Lady Beatrice Wetherby no matter how much he loved her. He just wasn’t enough gentleman for a lady of her station.
As Pippa accepted a handkerchief from Nick, Alfie saw Bea’s composure shatter. She began to cry, quietly at first, but then more openly, unable to hold back the tears. He noticed Wendy discreetly wiping away her own tears while Felix and Andre stood protectively at her sides. Yet it was Bea’s raw, unfilteredpain that gripped him. Her tears weren’t just for the beauty of the vows; they were an outpouring of deeper pain that only he, apparently, recognized.
Alfie felt a pang of guilt, knowing he was partly responsible for her distress. Unsure what he had said in the carriage and astonished at how much the truth serum had affected him, Alfie feared he’d said something terrible. All day, he had avoided her since during the night before, his own insecurities and fears created a distance between them. Now, standing here amid the celebration of love and commitment, that distance felt insurmountable. He wrestled with the urge to go to her, to bridge that gap, but his feet remained rooted to the spot, his body betraying his heart’s deepest desires.
And then, suddenly, Bea moved. It wasn’t a gradual retreat but a sudden, desperate flight. She turned and ran, her dress billowing out behind her like a white sail caught in a fierce wind. Alfie’s breath caught in his throat as he watched her flee, the sight of her retreating figure searing itself into his memory. Each step she took away from the ceremony felt like a cleft between them.
For a moment, everything seemed to freeze. The joyous bustle from the guests, the gentle rustling of leaves in the orchard, even the light seemed to dim around him. All he could focus on was Bea, disappearing into the distance, her pain now echoing his own. Alfie knew he had to do something, but he was paralyzed, trapped in his own hesitation and regret.
Finally, spurred into action by the realization that he could not let her go like this, he started to move. The world around him slowly came back into focus, and then all that mattered was reaching Bea, finding a way to mend whatever had broken between them. As he began to follow her, he was determined. He would not let this moment slip away; he would not lose her without a fight.
The applause and cheers from the wedding ceremony faded into a distant hum as he sprinted across the garden, his eyes locked on the path she had taken. The orchard loomed ahead, its rows of fruit-laden trees casting dappled shadows on the ground. He pushed past branches and leaves, his breath coming in sharp bursts as he navigated the twists and turns of the orchard.
The scent of ripe apples filled the air, mingling with the earthy aroma of the soil beneath his feet. Alfie’s heart pounded in his chest, each beat echoing the urgency he felt. He caught glimpses of Bea’s dress through the gaps in the trees, a flash of white amidst the greenery, guiding him forward like a beacon.
“Bea!” he called out, his voice strained but resolute. There was no response, only the rustle of leaves and the distant chirping of birds. He quickened his pace, his thoughts a whirlwind of regret and again, of determination. He couldn’t let her slip away, not like this, not when so much was left unsaid.
He rounded a corner in the orchard and finally saw her ahead, her pace slowing as she neared the edge of the trees. She glanced back, their eyes meeting for a brief, heart-wrenching moment before she turned and continued running. Alfie felt a surge of desperation, his legs burning with the effort to close the distance between them.
Bea reached the side of the main house, her movements now more frantic as she fumbled with the door handle. Alfie was close behind, his hand reaching out as if he could catch her by sheer will alone. She slipped inside just as he reached the threshold, the door swinging shut behind her with a soft thud.
Undeterred, Alfie pushed the door open and stepped into the dimly lit hallway. The cool, air of the old house enveloped him, a stark contrast to the bright, sunlit garden outside. He could hear Bea’s footsteps echoing through the corridor, leading him deeper into the labyrinth of rooms and passageways.
“Bea, please!” he called again, his voice softer now, tinged with a pleading note. He followed the sound of her footsteps, his own steps measured but urgent. The walls around him seemed to close in, the antique portraits and ornate wallpaper blurring as he focused solely on finding her.
“Oh,nowyou will speak to me?” Her voice wobbled and he looked up the staircase, seeing her more than twenty steps above.
He took two steps at a time and caught up with her just when she slipped into a bed chamber. Bea stood in the center of the room, her back to him, her shoulders rising and falling with each ragged breath. Alfie took a hesitant step forward, his heart breaking at the sight of her so vulnerable and distraught.
