Page 63 of Worst Nanny Ever
I stop pushing the cart and just look at her for a second, trying to get a handle on this woman who has taken over so much space in my brain and my life. “I understand why you’d want to help Ollie, but why Eugene?”
“Because he’s the new me,” she says. “I don’t want him to terrorize the people I worked with. Or my brother.”
I raise my eyebrows, waiting.
“Fine,” she says, rolling her eyes. “He’s also super pathetic. He made me feel bad for him.”
I don’t fully buy it, but I can tell she’s explained as much as she intends to.
“I don’t know how I can help,” I say. “If I invited Mrs. Applebaum over for tea, she’d probably file a restraining order. The mouse thing really put it over the edge for her.”
She reaches over and idly pets a huge stuffed animal—a fluffy yellow dog. I reach for it and toss it into the cart.
“You think Ollie will like it?” she asks.
“It’s for you.”
Her lips part as if she’s going to object, or maybe make a big deal out of it, so I change the subject, saying, “I don’t know how we’d even get them in the same room.”
Her brow furrows as she considers the challenge. “What if we ask Eugene to intervene on Ollie’s behalf?”
“Would he?” I move the cart along. “He doesn’t even know Ollie.”
“So, maybe he can tutor him or something first.”
I give her a pointed look. “Ollie doesn’t need tutoring, and from what I can tell, Eugene doesn’t have the manners or social skills to help him with what he does need.”
She sighs dramatically. “All right, twist my arm. We’re going to have to Parent Trap Eugene and Mrs. Applebaum.”
“This is important to you.” I come to a stop so I can get a better look at her.
“It is,” she says.
“Will you tell me why?”
“I don’t know, Travis,” she says with a frustrated laugh. “It just is. I mean, what are the odds that you’d be having troublewith a grumpy teacher today while I’m having a meet and greet with that teacher’s grumpy former principal, who quite clearly had a thing for her. It feels like…”
I grin at her. “Well, well, were you about to say that setting them up feels like fate?”
She blushes. I didn’t know Hannahcouldblush. “Take that back.” She nudges my shoulder. “You’re going to ruin my reputation as a hard-ass.”
“I’m not so sure you have one.”
“Are you going to help me or not?”
Against my better judgment, I nod. To do anything else would disappoint her, and it seems very important not to disappoint her. “Okay, sure. You tell me how to help with your ill-advised plan, and I’m there.”
A tired-looking brunette woman with a basket slung over her arm passes us, giving me a strange sidelong look. I could have sworn she’s already passed us, so maybe we’re standing in front of some must-have toy she wants for her kid.
I start moving the cart again. “Now, what are we going to get?”
“What kind of budget are we working with?” Hannah asks.
“An I-didn’t-even-know-my-kid-existed-until-he-was-seven kind of budget.”
“Then we’re getting everything,” Hannah says with a grin. “Can you imagine what his face is going to look like when he gets home?”
I smile back at her, but I’m not convinced Ollie’s going to be so easy to please after Mousegate. In fact, I’m pretty worried about what the rest of his day is going to look like. Will the other kids blame him? Will Mickey be humbled after screaming like a baby and pulling a runner, or does he now have a deep-seated grudge against my son that’ll last through high school?
