Page 144 of Worst Nanny Ever
He shakes his head, but he doesn’t look pissed, at least. After a moment, the corners of his lips curve up in an amused smile. “Dammit. I wish you’d told me.”
“You wouldn’t have agreed.” I pause, but he doesn’t disputeit. “And I didn’t do it just for you. I needed this too. But…yeah, I should have told you sooner.”
He gives me a sidelong look and then turns to face me more fully. “The band’s not dead. It’s not dead until we say it is. Do you want it to be dead, Travis? Because we’ll piss on its grave if you say so. I can find another band to join.”
Until this moment, I wasn’t totally sure.
But now I know. This is what I want. I want my son, and I want Hannah, and I want my band. And I want Garbage Fire to do well, whatever that ends up meaning.
“Let’s put it on life support. I think there’s some life in this garbage fire yet.”
He grins at me, I grin back, and I feel a weight lift off my chest. “Besides,” I add, “I may have a lead on a rhythm guitarist.
I tell him about the Moroney Movers and Shakers and Liam, who came over to practice “Blue River” with Hannah and me. He’s not interested in joining the band long term, but he has a couple of buddies who play, and he’s willing to fill in until we find someone permanent.
“No shit?” Rob says, shaking his head. “We were short a rhythm guitarist, and now we’re short a bass player.”
“Maybe the universe has more surprises in store for us.”
“I know you’re joking,” he says, “but I’ve learned that stuff’s no joking matter.”
I nod, because it’s the truth, and I feel in my bones that the universe isn’t done with me yet.
“I feel awful about what went down with Bixby,” I admit.
“So do I, but he made his own problems. If he’d told us he was struggling, we could have worked something out. All of this could have been avoided. Frank wanted us for us, dammit.”
I shrug. “Maybe Frank will still be interested. You know, once fate magically drops a bass player onto our laps.”
“I’ll put up the ad,” he says. “We’ll get on it. But we’ll haveto cancel our next few shows. I’ve already called the brewery we were supposed to play at on Saturday.”
I nod, still feeling sick at the thought of Bixby. Yesterday morning, when I threw on my shirt before answering the door, I noticed the red marks had darkened into deep purple bruises, but it felt right for the hurt to show on the outside. “We’re never going to be friends like that again. I can’t trust him, and that sucks. He’s been with us since the beginning.”
He nods, and I can tell from the circles under his eyes, he’s been losing sleep over it. “But he didn’t act the way a friend does. He was selfish, and it cost all of us.”
“Should we exchange friendship bracelets now?”
“We can,” he says, laughing. “I’ve got about two dozen of them back at the apartment. Sophie’s planning a new class.”
I bump his shoulder, feeling an intense swell of emotion. “I love you, man.”
“Back at you,” he says, then forces a grin. “And, hey, we’re best friends dating best friends. They make TV shows about that kind of thing.”
I feign a dramatic shudder. “No, thank you.” I pause before telling him what’s in my heart. “But something tells me we’re going to be best friends married to best friends someday.”
This time his grin is so big his face creases with it. “From your mouth to God’s ears, my friend.”
“I love Hannah,” I say. “I don’t feel like I deserve her, but I’m not about to complain.”
“I know how that feels.”
We hug spontaneously, and then we start setting up for the kids. Just like that, this space feels like mine again. It feels safe.
CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE
TRAVIS
Lilah being Lilah, she texts me just as I’m leaving The Missing Beat for Big Catch.
