HOPE
Tonight’s shiftfeels like it might never end. I wipe down the same stretch of counter I cleaned ten minutes ago, not because it needs it, but because standing still makes the silence too loud.
A couple of regulars congregate around the dartboard in the corner, and a guy near the window scrolls on his phone.
Amazingly, Darren texted earlier to say he won’t be coming in tonight, and if it’s dead, we can close up early. He’s been nice for over a week now, and we’re both completely confused. By “nice,” I mean thoughtful and accommodating, which is definitely not normal for him.
It’s like he swapped personalities with a decent human being, and while it’s certainly made our lives easier and way better, the change is baffling.
Chloe and I have a wager on what happened to him. She thinks he fell down the stairs drunk—which would account for his bruises—hit his head, got amnesia, and forgot to be a dick. I think he was abducted by aliens, who kept the real Darren for anal-probe experiments, and they’ve actually sent back a robot clone.
Whatever the case, we’re both grateful to have nothing to do with him.
I lean my hip against the bar, watching Chloe apply a layer of lipstick while staring into her small compact mirror in anticipation of her date after tonight’s shift.
“Who’s the lucky fella?” I ask.
She grins. “A guy I met at Inferno a few weekends ago. Or maybe it was Tinder. Can’t remember now.” She drops the mirror and lipstick into her bag and shrugs. “He’s hot, has a nice car, and doesn’t live with his parents. That’s the holy trinity, right?”
I chuckle. “High standards.”
“I’m not looking for a boyfriend or anything, but sometimes a girl’s gotta get laid. You know?”
I nod, because I do know. It’s just not an option for me.
She eyes me sideways. “How come you never hook up? Have you looked in the mirror? You do realize you can have any man you want, right?”
An image of Lukas flashes through my mind: tall, broad-shouldered, with a low, rumbling voice tinged with an accent that makes my stomach flip. I’ve Googled him countless times, scrolling through his author website even though it’s in Swedish, hoping to find photos of him.
But of course, he’s not coming back to this piece-of-shit pub. He’s probably already gone back to Sweden.
“Yeah, right.” I laugh off the compliment, though part of me wonders if she’s right. I used to think I was pretty enough; back at uni, I never had trouble getting attention when I wanted it. But that feels like another lifetime. “It’s not like anyone interesting comes through here, and sadly, this is where I spend all of my time these days.”
“That’s not true. The hot Viking from the other week was interesting. Remember the one you promised you’d fuck if he showed up here again?” Chloe raises her eyebrows suggestively.
My stomach does a little swoop at the memory. “Those were not my words.”
She waves her hand dismissively. “Let’s not argue about semantics. You know what I meant.”
“Anyway… that hot Viking is probably back in Sweden, writing his next masterpiece.” I swallow hard and focus on arranging the clean glasses in perfect rows. “He’s long gone.”
Except in my fantasies.
Chloe sighs like I’m a lost cause and leans her chin on her palm. “You can’t just work, sleep, rinse and repeat. That’s not living, Lil. That’s surviving.”
If she only knew how accurate that statement is.
I grab a towel and start dusting the bottles behind the bar for something to do, anything to avoid meeting her eyes as I lie to her face.
“You know how it is. I need to make rent and save up for school. Fun’s not really in the budget right now.”
“Are your parents really such assholes they wouldn’t even lend you a little money?”
“Unfortunately, yes,” I say, wiping down a bottle of gin that looks like it’s been here since the seventies. “I’d rather not talk about my family. It’s… complicated.”
“Well, if you won’t go to the party… I’ll have to bring the party to you.” Chloe grins mischievously as she grabs her phone from the shelf under the till.
“Stand back, grandma,” she announces, right beforePonyby Ginuwine blares through the speaker.