Page 77 of Pillow Talk
‘Shona, I checked out a long time ago. I began to ignore your grandmother and I realised that it made me feel good. So I started removing myself from anything that made me angry or sad. It was no way to deal with conflict, but it’s worked until now,’ she said.
‘Why? What’s happened now?’
Her mother started crying.
‘I’m losing my girls. Aruna is moving away and you…you may never forgive us,’ she said between sobs. She covered her eyes and wept into her hands.
‘Mom, I’m sorry for some of the things I said. I felt trapped, but I’ve since come to realise that it wasn’t your or Dad’s doing,’ said Shona. She got up and gently embraced her mom.
Her mother removed her hands from her eyes and looked at her.
‘Shona … my Shona, are you happy?’
‘I think so, Mom, but I have to resolve things with Dad too. It’s time for this family to let go of the shop.’
Shona left her parents’ home with a promise to stop by during the week to show her mother pictures of some of her designs. She chose not to take a taxi. It would be a long walk but it would help her think. She was still stunned by what her mom had revealed to her. Her father was a qualified teacher; her parents had almost split up because of her grandmother…
By the time she reached her apartment building it was just after 5pm. She took the lift because her legs felt like lead.
Once inside, she quickly undressed and stood under the shower. She began to weep. She cried for the pain her mother and father had experienced. She cried for her sister’s lost dream of becoming a professional dancer. She cried until she had no more tears.
She turned off the shower, dried herself, put on her favourite PJs and curled up in bed.
Rain hammered the pavement and lightning split the sky as Shona hurried into her apartment building. Afternoon thunderstorms were common in Rally during summer but this was the first of the season.
Her clothes were soaked through even though she’d almost made it back from the courier company when the heavens opened. As soon as she got inside, she kicked off her rubber sandals and struggled out of her soggy clothes while running to the bathroom.
She stood naked, deciding which was better: a quick shower or a long bath. A quick shower would give her time to finish two veils before bedtime but a long bath was calling her name. She opened her medicine cabinet and found a small bottle of bubble bath – one of the goodies from Anni’s bachelorette weekend away. She emptied the bottle into the tub and opened the tap, standing back to breathe in the rich vanilla scent that filled her bathroom. When there was a generous amount of water in the bath, Shona stepped in and sank indulgently into the bubbles.
She closed her eyes and, without warning or invitation, a miserable memory popped up. It was the first time her grandmother had fired her from the shop. Working at the shop wasn’t a paid job but her grandmother treated her and Aruna like employees and expected them to behave like she was their boss. While everyone else’s grandmothers were baking cookies, having sleepovers and spoiling them, their grandmother kept a small notebook to record their wrongdoings. The notebook was under lock and key in a drawer under the counter. She would wave it around like a gun when she or Aruna stepped out of line. At first, her mom had argued with Grandma over the threat, but without Shona’s dad backing her up, she’d simply given up.
He would say, ‘Your grandmother just wants to teach you both about work ethic. You’ll need it in the real working world.’
Now, years later, she knew that no one should ever feel afraid at work. That notebook had instilled fear and, even now when she thought about it, her heart ached for that little girl who’d been terrified of it.
She was about 10 when she got fired. It was a rainy day much like today. Her mother couldn’t fetch her from school like she usually did on rainy days because she was in bed with a terrible cold, as was Aruna. Her father had gone to the warehouse to choose new fabric and no one else could leave the shop. Shona would be the first to admit that when she was a child, the shopwas always busy. But someone should at least have fetched her from school. She waited for about 20minutes and, when no one showed up, she and Anni decided to brave the thunderstorm. They held hands, fearing the roaring thunder with each step they took.
After saying goodbye to Anni at her house, Shona ran all the way home. At one point, she just wanted to close her eyes and run because she was so scared. The sky was dark with bulging rain clouds and the only sound was the heavy raindrops beating the tar. She finally made it to her house. Her mother stumbled out of bed, coughing, sneezing and weak, and cursing Shona’s dad for not postponing his trip to the fabric supplier.
Shona remembered shivering, her teeth chattering as her mother ran her a hot bath. The air filled with a subtle vanilla scent as her mom poured in some bubble bath.
She missed work that day – and it went down in the notebook.
The next day was a Saturday. She had breakfast and got into the car to go to the shop with her dad. But her grandmother refused to let her enter.
‘She is fired. You want her to grow up thinking that it’s okay to miss a day at work?’
Her father tried to reason with his mother but she waved the notebook in his face. Drake didn’t even dare open his mouth. He was too afraid of losing his job. The other staff were horrified but they, too, remained silent. Their eyes were filled with pity.
Shona started to cry. After all, she was just a kid. She shouldn’t have to be humiliated and shouted at, but that was her grandmother’s way. Her father gave up and took her home. She remembered his fake smile when he dropped her off. He joked that she could use this bonus time to watch cartoons all day. She nodded, but her heart felt heavy – too heavy for a 10-year-old because, in that moment, she began to lose respect for him.
A couple of days later, her grandmother needed her back in theshop. It was only now, years later, that she realised why. At the time she’d thought the cruel old woman was sorry but now, lying in the tub in her bathroom, next to the bedroom where she’d explored every inch of his body, she realised she’d got her job back because of Sen.
His grandfather had a standing appointment at the shop every summer and he would bring Sen with him. Sen would agree to everything as long as Shona was there. He would say yes to anything the salespeople offered him just to get them off his back, so he could play with Shona in the back office. And the longer he stayed, the more his grandfather bought. That year she was 10 and he’d already turned 11. They were no longer interested in running along the corridors from the shop into the workrooms. No. That year, Sen had brought a few books from his school library to show her. But they didn’t open any of the books even once. Instead they sat opposite each other at her father’s desk, talking about school, their friends, the latest pop music, all the bad things they wished for Avi, and everything else. When Sen’s grandfather finally called for Sen to leave, they realised they’d been talking for over two hours.
An unfamiliar flutter caught Shona off guard as she lay in the tub. A funny feeling tightened in her stomach. It wasn’t just a pang. It was something more. A tremble of nerves, a spark of excitement. And the realisation that the bad memory had been replaced with a good one – of Sen in the shop.
Sen rubbed his eyes. It was 11pm and he was still at the office. Lawrence Jackard was a jackass. He knew this. He reminded himself of it whenever he worked on anything that had to do with him and yet he kept him as a client. And it had nothing todo with his stepdaughter, Tamira. Tamira was a typical diva. She lived off her family’s wealth and her only job was to attend social functions. Sen had been on a few dates with her, but there was no chemistry to prompt even having a fling with her. Truth be told, she bored him.
