Page 17 of Privilege
“How do you know? She hasn’t met any of us yet.”
His fingers flex against my chest. “She’s better than that.”
I laugh, short and cold. “Nobody is better than that, brother.”
His face is so sharp that for the first time I truly see his mother in him. See who he could’ve been if I’d let it happen. I imagine the other side of the coin, where he isn’t smiling with Cara by his side. The one where Jamie has a ring on her finger, and a nanny trails behind with a Dick Jr. Jr. on her hip. The one where he gets a job that his mother orchestrated for him. One where she has all the power and pulls all the strings. I see the life that he’d hate, and my stomach churns.
I thought he’d made it out of this mahogany hellhole. I thought I wouldn’t have to worry about him anymore.
A chill runs down my spine.I was wrong.
Rich frowns, like he’s trying to figure me out. The change in him is subtle—nobody but me would notice—but it’s there. The ice in him thaws a little, like a slow burning fire has sparked to life in the brown eyes I know so well.
My skin prickles where his palms connect with my torso, and I lean into the pressure enough for his pupils to dilate. Our mouths are so close I can practically taste him. His lips part involuntarily, thepopof his mouth so quiet I think I’m imagining it. The front of his shorts brush so softly against my—
He shoves me again, uses the momentum to push off of me, move back a foot or two and cross his arms like he’s protecting his chest. He might be able to cover up his torso, but he can’t hide the lingering glance at my dick. Catching himself, he shakes his head a little, droplets of water flinging off the wavy tips of his hair.
“This isn’t high school,” he says slowly. His voice is low. Threatening. “I’m not the same as I was then, Dane.”
I reach forward and poke him in the chest with my pointer finger. “Listen little brother. Can I grab a towel at least? I think everybody has seen enough cock today.”
Careful, Dane. No need for him to know you watched him fuck her.
After what feels like an eternity, he says “Do whatever you want, Dane. You always do.”
One Year Ago
Rich
This year has been…hard. Dane never showed up after he graduated, simply took off to Ibiza with his buddies and went AWOL. I saw snippets on social media; clubs and raves, a new girl on his arm every day, and I tried to be happy for him. I really did. But seeing those girls all over him made something raw and hot settle into my skin. Like a branding iron everywhere all at once.
Why did he leave like that? Why isn’t he answering my texts?
Jamie has been frustrated with me and we broke up more than usual this year. She says I’ve been adowner, that I haven’t beenfully utilizing my senior year,whatever the fuck that means. She’s probably just pissed that I haven’t bothered breaking into her dorm at the girls prep, but I can’t be bothered to climb that fucking lattice. I can’t be bothered with much of anything, these days.
Apart from a few cursory one-line texts, Dane and I have barely spoken. I don’t know why I thought he’d stay in touch—he more than deserves time to himself after all the shit he’s put up with from my mother—but it still hurts. We’d never gone more than a few days apart, usually for polo tourneys, and he texted me the entire time I was away like a clingy girlfriend. Now, silence.
For a while, I thought something happened. That maybe mother told him to get gone and leave me to fulfill my van der Beer destiny. But eventually I realized he’d more or less moved on. Left me behind.
I sank into a funk that lasted the rest of the school year.
It’s almost up. Graduation time. That unopened Harvard letter in my nightstand is giving me heart palpitations. Jamie is circling like a vulture, waiting for me to accept so that she can get us an apartment.She was waitlisted for Harvard, but she accepted Boston U knowing I was headed to Cambridge.
The idea of living with her makes me want to throw up.
PING.
My phone echoes like a gunshot, casting my room in a glowing blue light. I roll over and pick it up off my nightstand. The screen burns my retinas, but my chest constricts at the name on the screen:Dane.
Have you fucked your roommate yet? You can’t leave boarding school without at least one super gay story to tell your future wife
I smile, so excited to hear from my brother that my first attempt at a response is so mashed up even auto-correct can’t fix it.
My standards are higher than yours. I went for Professor McFadden
Please tell me he cleaned his glasses with his shirt while you sucked him off
Who says Isucked him off?
