Page 18 of You Rock My World
She’s flipped a switch inside me, and I’m not positive I can turn it off.
11
JOSIE
September—Present Time
Half a glass of margarita later, I’m on the gallery patio, watching the sky bleed pink over the rooftops when familiar footsteps echo up the stairwell.
My sister emerges still dressed in her nurse scrubs, hair pulled into a haphazard ponytail. I take Lily in. The faded badge clipped to her collar, the creases under her eyes deepened by another twelve-hour shift. She looks exhausted—not the exhaustion that comes from a long day at work, but a weariness that has taken root in her soul, dulling her gaze and knocking the bounce from her steps.
My problems seem so small compared to hers. I feel selfish for even sitting here wallowing.
But despite the shit hand of cards fate has dealt her, Lily’s eyes soften when she spots me. She pauses at the patio railing, her gaze flitting from my face to the drink in my hand, and her lips curve into a small smile. “Why are you drinking and staring into the sunset like you’re posing for a reel calledSad Girl Aesthetic?”
I snort and wave my glass. “There’s a pitcher in the fridge. Join me?”
Lily plucks the cocktail from my hand and sniffs. “Hmm, you used the good tequila. Must be serious.”
She has no idea.
Lily shrugs and returns the glass. “Why not? Tomorrow’s my day off.”
A few minutes later, she comes back with the pitcher and a fresh glass, settling into the chair beside me with a tired exhale. “So, what are we drinking to, or at, or trying to forget?”
I keep my eyes on the sky. “He’s getting a divorce.”
Lily frowns. “I’m going to need a little more context. Who’s ‘he’?” I shoot her a look, and her jaw drops. “Nooo. Rian Phoenix?”
I nod and recap everything, swearing her to secrecy until the divorce goes public. Lily sets down her glass. “And the only reason he gave is ‘different lifestyles’?”
“He didn’t tell me everything.” I shrug. “It’s obviously painful for him. When he said Billie wanted to keep living the fast life, he mentioned parties, but I can’t imagine what ‘partying’ means in their world. But he got tired of it, whatever ‘it’ was. He told me that the harder he pulled back, the more she pushed into it. And it tore them apart.”
“Drugs?”
“Yeah. One of their biggest issues was her refusing to go to rehab.”
“Were they already having problems when you met him?”
“They’ve been separated for two years.” That his marriage was already broken when we met hit me the hardest. It had me rethink everything we shared in the elevator. I cringed at all the dumb comments I made about him and Billie being my favorite celebrity couple. But more than anything, it cast everything he said about me in a different light. I’d assumed those were the compliments of a happily married man, seeing the good in me. Two strangers having a platonic connection in a crappy situation. But since this afternoon, my silly, starry-eyed brain has been churning with a delusional hope that he meant something else, something more?
Lily cuts through the delirium of wishful thinking. “And he never mentioned anything in the elevator?”
“Dorian is a celebrity, he wouldn’t tell a stranger he’s having marriage problems.” I bite the inside of my cheek, chewing on both flesh and thoughts. “And it took them another year to call it quits. I don’t know how defined the situation was back then.”
“And now that he is single, you still can’t date him because he’s a client?”
I top off my drink, deflecting, “It doesn’t matter. He’s probably not interested.”
“But he asked for you specifically?”
“He doesn’t like new people. I’m familiar. It’s practical.”
Lily leans back in her chair, crossing her legs, unconvinced. “Okay, but what aboutyourfeelings, Josie? You okay working for him?”
“It’s not forever.” I do some quick mental calculations aloud. “Missy will give birth at the end of March. She’ll be back by next summer, fall at the latest.”
“And you can last that long? Unscathed?”
