Page 171 of The Delta's Rogue
“I have been in the heart of their operation and experienced what no female should ever experience,” I continue. “I know firsthand what every female they’ve captured has been through, and those memories will haunt me for the rest of my life. The scars on my skin aren’t the only scars I bear, and none of them will ever heal completely.” I take one last deep breath and push out the rest of my announcement. “Which is why I am stepping down as the leader of this mission.”
Eyes blink. Jaws drop.My shoulders tremble, and my sniffling inhales are the only sound in the room as everyone processes my words of resignation.
“But, Sarina, you—”
“My decision is final,” I declare through my tears to whomever is trying to change my mind. “I can’t do what needs to be done or make the decisions that need to be made. Not right now. Not when I’m healing and my lycan is silent, and I’m not sure what’s real and what’s in my head.”
Every word is harder to say than the last. Every word is weaker than the last until my voice is nothing more than a whispered sob.
Sebastian releases my hand and curls his fingers around my hip. He places a kiss to my temple. I lean into him as he holds me, searching for the strength I know he’s sending me through the bond I can’t sense.
“I’m going to rest now,” I rasp out. “I trust everyone in this room, and I know that no matter who takes over for me, this mission will be in good hands. It will be in the best hands.”
Sebastian follows me as I leave the dining room, but when I reach the arch to the entryway, I take his hand and stop him. I need a moment alone.
“Necesito estar sola por un momento,” I plead. “Por favor.”
He cups my cheek, blocking me from the rest of the room with his towering body.“¿Estás segura?”
“Yes, I’m sure,mi vida.”
He sets his jaw and nods. “Te busco más tarde.” He lowers his lips to my forehead.
With the assurance that he’ll find me later, I bury my face in his chest. I sigh in relief that he doesn’t push me on my decision and try to force his presence on me when I need some time to myself.
“Gracias,” I thank him.
“Tú sabes que yo haría lo que fuera por ti.”
I squeeze my eyes shut. I know he would do anything for me. He’s proven that time and time again. He risked everything to rescue me.
“Even let me be alone when your instincts tell you to protect me?”
“When I say anything, I mean anything, Sarina.”
He was willing to give up pack life to become a nomad with me, and he stepped up to be my king, my partner in ruling the kingdom, even though he never wanted responsibility like that.
Yet I’m hesitant, because I’m unsure if any of this is real. And if it is real, do I deserve the patience and love he gives me? Do I deserve the sacrifices he’s making to be with me?
“Go. Rest.” He holds me at arm’s length, breaking me out of my twisted thoughts. “Take as long as you need.”
I blink my eyesopen as Sebastian sits on the edge of the bed, his hand combing through my slightly damp hair. My lips tip into a drowsy smile, and my eyelids flutter, the weight of sleep still heavy on all of me.
I came straight to the room after I made my announcement to the others. I showered, threw on one of Sebastian’s shirts and a pair of the new underwear he brought for me, and then crawled under the covers, all with my eyes barely opened.
Sebastian lies down next to me, and I scoot closer to him, attracted to his warmth like a heat-seeking missile.
He holds me in his arms and rubs my back, soothing me into a half-asleep state. “There’s an entire drawer of clothes for you, you know,” he teases quietly, a touch of laughter tinting his voice.
“Lo sé,” I confirm.
“So, why are you wearingmyshirt?”
“Your shirts remind me of you.” I shrug. “I can’t smell your scent on them, but just knowing they’re yours… It helps.”
“And what is my scent?” he asks.
My eyes open and stay open this time, locked onto his. “Lemons, cedar, and mint,” I whisper.
