Page 25 of Hidden Vows
Bringing my eyes back to him, I give him the truth. “I wouldn’t take any of it back. I don’t know who Abbey is anymore, but I know who I’ve become, and while I wish I could have become this person without causing anyone pain, I know I wouldn’t be who I am today if I stayed in this town.”
“Jude—”
“No.” I put my hand up, stopping Caleb from continuing. “This isn’t me putting myself down or fishing for validation. I am who I am today because of everything I went through.” My hand falls, holding the edge of the bar in a tight grip. “And while I don’t know everything about Abbey right now, in my gut, I know she’s exactly who she’s supposed to be because of everything she’s endured.”
“So, that’s it? You’re just going to let the love of your life go?You’re going to leave town and never look back?”
Without hesitation or taking my eyes off his, I give him another truth. “No. I’m going to fight like hell to get Abbey back, and I’m never leaving this town without her by my side again.”
“Hell yeah!” He fist pumps the air, a goofy smile taking over his face. “What’s the plan?”
The corners of my lips tip up in a small smile. “Nope. I don’t want anyone’s input.”
“Oh, come on! I wanna help!”
I laugh, grabbing his empty glass and refilling it. “You sound like a five-year-old.”
“So what? Let me help.” And now he bounces in his seat like a five-year-old.
I shake my head, placing his fresh pint in front of him. “If I need help I promise I’ll ask, but I want to try this my way first.”
“Fine,” he grumbles, taking a deep pull from his beer.
“Enough about me.” My smile falls. I don’t want to bring down the mood, but this is the first time I’ve seen Caleb since that night in the hospital, and unfortunately for all of us, I’m not the only one going through something. “I heard about your dad. I’m so sorry for your loss. I know that’s not enough, but?—”
“No.” He shakes his head, his eyes falling to the bar before him for a second. “It’s enough.”
We’re both quiet for a minute, sitting in our own thoughts, but I’ve got a lot to catch up on, not just with Abbey but with the other people I’ve hurt as well.
“Tell me what else I’ve missed.”
eleven
JUDE
“What madeyou decide to open the bar?” Gage asks from his seat across from me a few days after my conversation with Caleb.
“Honestly, I needed something else to do besides sitting by my dad’s hospital bed. I love the man, but it’s a little boring watching him sleep nonstop.” I attempt a smile, trying to bring a little levity to a heavy topic.
The honest truth is that the doctors can’t tell us why he hasn’t woken up yet, and it’s starting to scare me. The swelling in his brain has gone down, and they’ve weened him off the meds that were keeping him sedated and removed the breathing tube, so there’s no easy explanation for why he’s still isn’t awake. The only thing keeping me from going completely out of my mind is that all their scans and tests show that he has normal brain function, meaning he’s not brain-dead, just…stuck in limbo.
“What do you normally do? When you’re not here, I mean. Like, what have you been doing for the last seventeen years?” There’s no judgment in his tone, only curiosity, and that makes me smile because that’s the same Gage I’ve always known.
“I’ve done a little bit of everything since I left town.” I wipe down the bar top next to Gage, not because it needs to be cleaned, but to have something else to focus on. I’m not sure if I’m ready for everyone to know about my secret author career. Thatisone thing I swore my father to secrecy on.
“Okay…” He lets the word hang before setting his beer down and leaning forward. “But what have you been doing recently?”
Gage probably thinks his patient look as he stares at me silently will make me uncomfortable enough to tell him the truth. Bad news for him…I don’t break that easily.
“I’d just gotten to Harborview the day you called. I wasn’t doing anything quite yet.”
“Speaking of Harborview. How crazy is it that you were in the town Ava and Declan grew up in?”
It’s nice to know not everything changes. Gage may want to know what I’ve been up to since I left town, but he won’t push me when I’ve avoided the same question twice. The man before me still knows me just as well as I know him.
“I’ve met Ava, obviously, but tell me more about Declan.”
Caleb told me a bit about his sister and new brother-in-law, but he focused more on his wife and new daughter than anything else. The look of pure love and devotion as he showed me picture after picture made me both happy for him and incredibly jealous.
