Page 71 of Hidden Vows
I’m not surprised by the question, but I wasn’t looking forward to it either. “The honest answer is that I didn’t think I deserved it.” Abbey lifts her head and opens her mouth to say something, but I don’t let her. I need to get this out. “When I signed my first deal with my publisher…it was more money than I knew what to do with—it was more money than I thought I’d ever see in my lifetime.” It’s my turn to trace the title on the cover of the book between us.
I still don’t understand why they’d been willing to offer so much to a nobody like me. I had absolutely no training or formal education and was truly flying by the seat of my pants. But they took a chance on me and somehow it all paid off.
“I thought it was insane they wanted to pay me so much money to write a few books for them, and I thought putting a different name on it would let me dissociate from the entire thing.” I lift myeyes to Abbey’s—she deserves the next words to be said to her face, not to an inanimate object. “After everything I’d put you and my dad through, I didn’t think it was fair to have so much security.”
“Jude—”
“I know it doesn’t make sense, and you probably never would’ve agreed with me, even when you hated me?—”
“I never hated you.” Abbey leans against the top of the box between us, bringing her face closer to mine, a small smile forming on her lips. “That was part of the problem,” she teases.
I wonder if I should hate that she can joke about the pain of our past, but the truth is that I love it. For me, it’s proof that we really are moving forward. That we can build a life together. One so much stronger than the one we had before.
“Well, you never hating me isn’t a problem for me,” I croon, mirroring her position against the top of the box.
“No, I guess it isn’t.” Her eyes dip down to my lips inches from hers and the second she swipes her tongue across her bottom lip, I can’t help myself—I don’t want to stop myself. I know she still has a bunch of questions simmering in that head of hers, but they’ll have to wait for later.
My lips land on hers in a demanding kiss, and when she responds in kind, I don’t even stop to contemplate that the door to the bookstore is unlocked and anyone could walk in. I crave her with everything I am.
Pulling her around the boxes between us, I devour her, lifting her into my arms and pressing her into the shelves against the wall. Everything about her reaction pushes me forward—the moan that slips from her lips, the way her hips grind against my hardening length, the grip she has on my shoulders.
Nothing could pull me away from her. Not now. Not ever.
thirty-two
ABBEY
A soundfrom the front of the store draws me out of the kitchen where I’ve been testing out different recipes for the opening next week. I know there’s still a lot for me to organize and set up, but most of the books have been unpacked and I couldn’t wait to play in my brand new commercial-grade kitchen. It’s quite literally my dream come true.
As I step out into the store, I immediately hear someone knocking at the door, and the longer it goes, the louder it becomes.
I haven’t removed the paper from the front windows and door yet, wanting to keep everything about this place a secret until the very last moment, and being here alone makes me quite nervous to open the door. I’m well aware I live in a small town where I know almost everyone, but I’m still a woman living in a world that constantly teaches us to be cautious, and opening that door goes against every instinct I have.
I contemplate calling Jude, who I know is in the bar helping Jane with the morning delivery, but as I’m turning to go back to the kitchen for my phone, the person on the other side of the door calls for me.
“Abbey, I know you’re in there. Jude told me when I knockedat your apartment.”
The sound of Emily’s muffled voice instantly calms me, and I rush to unlock and open the door. “Hey, what are you doing here? I thought you worked today.”
“I do, but I’ve got about an hour before my shift starts. I figured I could stop by and help for a bit.” Her gaze drifts around the space, and while the act on its own isn’t alarming since so much has changed since she’s been here, the tension pouring off her is.
“You thought you’d stop by to help for…what? Fifteen minutes?” My brows pinch and my concern grows when she refuses to meet my eye.
Last I saw her was Friday night when everyone showed up to help move everything into the store, and as far as I know, everything was great. We all had such a good time, laughing and goofing off. It felt good to be with everyone, it felt like I had my family with me. The only person missing was Walt.
“Oh god! Did something happen to Walt?” I turn to run for the kitchen, wondering why Jude wouldn’t come get me if something happened.
“No!” Emily shouts. “Walt’s fine!”
Her eyes finally meet mine when I turn to look at her, but the way she bites her lip doesn’t help me feel better. “What is it? You’re freaking me out.” My arms band around my waist, holding myself tight against whatever Emily’s about to say.
“I got your lab results back.” My entire body tightens, preparing for something unimaginable, but her next words are out before I can say anything. “You’re pregnant.”
“No,” I refuse immediately. “I’m on birth control. I can’t be pregnant.”
I don’t know if I ever seriously thought about having a baby.In an obscure way I’ve always known it was something I wanted to do, but the older I’ve gotten the less likely I thought it was. No matter what, this wasn’t the way I imagined it happening.
“I can’t be pregnant,” I repeat. “There’s no way.”
