Page 18 of Blind Trust
Again, he turned on the TV after they got in the room, and sat on the bed watching it, while she got her shower.
He had dozed off when she came out saying, “What’s on?”
Her voice woke him. “No idea. I dozed off.”
“I’m out now. The shower is all yours,” she said.
“Thanks.” He grabbed his clothes then went in to take his shower.
When he came out, she was awake and listening to a rerun of Johnny Carson.
“Johnny is still funny,” she said. “Even when the shows are dated. I listen to comedians more than I used to. It feels good to laugh.”
“It does,” Brian agreed. “Johnny is good. Hey, can I try one of your melatonin’s? I need a good night’s sleep.”
“Sure.” She rose and went to get the bottle. She picked it up then held it out to him. “They work really well.”
He took the bottle from her. “Thanks.”
He popped one and got into bed. He turned on his side, facing away from her. “Good night.”
“Good night,” she said as she got into bed, too.
He waited in silence, staying still, as he felt every movement she made, heard every sound, and imagined what touching her in this bed would be like.
She moved around in the bed, making the mattress move, as she wiggled to get comfortable.
With a huge effort, he forced his thoughts to something else. The only thing he could come up with was the date he’d plan for them once they got to San Diego and where he might take her to dinner. Then the melatonin kicked in and, as she’d said, it worked.
Tonight however, she didn’t sleep all the way through. One of her nightmares woke her.
Groggy with sleep, he heard her cry out.
“Help me, there’s a fire,” she mumbled.
He felt her rolling in the bed like a crocodile, lost in the dream, before her hand reached out to him, landing on his belly.
His stomach muscles clenched at her sudden touch.
And then she was next to him, her soft round breasts up against him, her hand smooth on his muscled belly, and down below, his quick and hard response to her touching his bare skin wasn’t something he could ignore.
He wanted her. Now.
But she was in the midst of a bad dream, so this was not the time to get horny, and then naked together.
This is not how our first time will be. She’ll be fully awake and freely saying yes to sex, or we won’t be having sex.
He’d known sleeping in this bed with her was a bad idea. But now, she needed him, so he held her close, and said, “Cecelia, baby, wake up. You’re having a bad dream. But you’re okay. You’re safe.”
She woke slow, groggy, yet seeming to want to burrow in against his warmth and strength, holding onto him as if that would keep her safe.
He tightened his arms around her and repeated the words, “You’re okay.”
When she was fully awake, her face flushed red, and she pulled away. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I didn’t mean to rub up against you like that.”
“It’s okay,” he said. “I understand you were dreaming, and you were scared. And I don’t mind holding you. In fact,” he held open his arms, and then, remembering she couldn’t see the gesture, he reached for her hand and tugged as if to pull her to him. “You can come back, come snuggle, if you want to. I’ll just hold you.”
“You’ll just hold me?” The look she gave him was incredulous.
