Page 117 of Any Second Now

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Abso-fucking-lutely not.

I did not just think that.

Really, I didn’t. I definitely cut off that dirty word halfway through.

“Fresh pitcher,” Barrett announces and stays standing to refill glasses.

“Thanks,” I manage. Kellen chuckles and I glance around the table at despondent faces. We really are pathetic.

“A toast.” Barrett lifts his glass. “Love sucks. Avoid it at all costs.” He chugs half his pint.

“I’ll drink to that,” Lachlan says and follows suit.

Love sucks.

Love?

Oh, for fuck’s sake.

I didn’t go and fall in love with Raleigh Hayes this summer, did I?

But even as I think it, my chest fills with warmth around those three little words, so much so that my heart might burst out of my body.

I fell in love with Raleigh.

I love her.

And I have a feeling it happened before this summer.

Have I loved her since New Year’s Eve, when I finally got to fulfill my college dream of kissing her?

Or did it happen long before that?

Have I loved her since college?

And this summer was my chance to get her to fall in love with me.

My second chance. Or third, if you count freshman year of college as the first.

And I didn’t understandthe assignment.

I think I fucked it up.

“Atticus, drink!” Barrett demands. “Or it’s bad luck.”

I gulp my beer toss and let my revelation settle.

I love Raleigh.

But she still broke up with me.

She’s still leaving.

“You okay, dude?” Kellen says quietly from next to me.

“I really fucked up.” My voice is low, only for my best friend.

“What do you mean?”

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