Page 116 of Since We're Here
I’m hyperaware of my proximity to Maddie.
It’s Saturday night in Dublin at Temple Bar and I’m waiting at the bar with Oliver and Ethan, Stella’s boyfriend and a giant ex-rugby player, for two glasses of red wine and four pints of Guinness. I glance over my shoulder at Maddie and her two sisters, smiling and laughing at a table together.
I can’t stop sneaking looks. It’s been three weeks since I’ve seen her. Three weeks without that smile, the easy laugh, her sweet words.
Maddie looks so happy and relaxed with her sisters. Not that she doesn’t always look happy—except when I’m firing her, or breaking up with her, or being an overall fecking eejit.
We’ve not spoke directly since I arrived, just a few awkward glances. My plan was to avoid her completely, but I’m not sure how that’s possible.
I won’t survive this road trip.
“I’ll get these back to Reese and Stella.” Ethan takes the two glasses of red wine from the bartender.
“Shame they dinna have Slea Head here,” Oliver says, his Scottish accent a comforting sound to my ears.
I nod. “Maybe one day.” The bartender expertly fills Guinness pint glasses with deep brown liquid, creamy foam swirled on top. “If it works out in the test pubs, maybe I’ll get to Dublin. That’s the dream.”
“Congratulations, Patrick. I’m proud of you.”
“Congratulate me when we can have a pint of Slea Head Irish Oktoberfest in Temple Bar.”
“Aye.”
Oliver looks from me to the table of Hart sisters, where I can’t stop myself from stealing glances.
“So you and Maddie, huh?”
“Reese told you.”
“Of course she did. Was it serious?” Oliver studies me. He knows me. He knows how I don’t date, don’t do relationships. Not after Cara and Noreen.
I shrug. “It doesn’t matter. It’s over now, and after this road trip and your wedding, we’ll never see each other again.”
“Well, that’s a clean break then, aye?” Oliver continues to watch me.
“Yes it is.”
“But maybe have a quick chat with her? So you don’t keep looking at each other like that.”
“Like what?”
“Like that.” Oliver rolls his eyes and nods back to the women.
At that moment, Maddie looks over. Her expression is filled with sadness and something else I can’t identify, and she attempts to wipe it clear as soon as our eyes meet.
Oliver chuckles. “Come on, mate.”
I shake my head and look down at my pint, swirling the dark liquid gently. My mobile vibrates with a text from my sister, and Oliver returns to the table with two of the pints.
Saoirse
How are things in Dublin?
Me
Fine
Saoirse
