Page 72 of Unless It's You
Gemma
Fantastic. One question: do you think Ethan knows about you meeting up with Ben, anyway? Think Ben told him?
I squirm in my soft spot on the couch as cold tingles of fear shoot up from my feet. It’s possible.
Me
I hope not
Gemma
lol. Hope is a fair strategy. See you in a bit
When it’s over, I’ll call Ethan. I’ll go see him. Tonight. I can tell him what happened. See Nessie. And maybe his bedroom door again.
I got this.
Walkinginto The Boar and The Bear brings back an avalanche of memories. Ben’s flat is only a block away, and we’d always come here for drinks and then spend the night at his place. Sure, his flat was bigger and nicer than mine. Still. I always felt like I was in his territory.
It’s a crowded night at the pub, but Ben’s waiting for me at the table we’d always claim in the corner. A bench on one side and a pair of wooden chairs on the other, far enough away from the door to not get distracted every time someone walks into the pub, but close enough to the center of the action that we could people watch.
I played the Unless Game countless times in my head while sitting at that table.
I haven’t seen Ben for six months. His handsomeness strikes me and a tiny, dull ache forms in my chest. Tall and slender, with blond hair and charming blue eyes. Before he spots me, I glance at the busy bar, but don’t see Gemma. She’ll be here.
Ben looks up from his pint and waves, standing when I get to the table, smiling so wide I think his face will crack in two.
“Stella, it’s so good to see you.” He opens his arms and pulls my body against his, saying my name in an easy-breezy way, unlike Ethan, from whom it comes out like a declaration.
Ben’s cologne engulfs me, cinnamon and bergamot, and I’m sucked right back to the year we spent together. He keeps his arms wrapped around me and I let my cheek rest against his shirt for a few seconds. Was this so bad? Sure, his polo shirt is kind of scratchy, not like the smooth button-ups Ethan always wears. And he’s hugging me a bit too tight, and I try to take a deep breath but can’t, because the air has left my body...
We broke up because I didn’t feel likemearound him.
Suddenly I’m imagining pressing my face against Ethan’s chest, not Ben’s, and I pull back sharply, narrowing my eyes at him.
“You okay?” Ben looks down at me with surprise, crinkling his forehead.
“Yeah.” I stare at the contours of his face, my eyes skimming over his smooth chin and cheeks, such a contrast to Ethan’s mountain-man beard. “Good to see you, too, Ben.”
He puts his hands on my arms and grins. “Come. Sit. I got you a drink.”
I settle in the seat across from him, leaving my small purse linked over my shoulder, and sip the full pint. I prefer red wine, but he always forgets and gets me beer. When I do drink beer, I like an IPA, not lager, but any alcohol will do right now.
“I’m sorry about your aunt.”
“Great-aunt. Thank you.” I drink again. He waits for me to say something, but instead I slurp another few inches off the top of the pint, like the lady that I am.
“So, she left you a bucket list? And said we shouldn’t have broken up?” Ben leans back and crosses one leg over the other, his hands folded on his lap, eyes steady on mine.
Choking on the amber liquid, I hold up a finger while I catch my breath.
He grins at me and leans forward, reaching over the table to pat my back, his hand resting on my body for too long, again.
I wish Ethan was here.He doesn’t make crazy assumptions, or put words in my mouth, or try to make me drink things I don’t want to drink or convince me to havechildren, for fuck’s sake. The thought slams into me as my throat relaxes and I can use my vocal cords again. Jesus, where did that come from?
And no, I don’t want Ethan to be here to witness this.
“Stella?” Ben looks worried again. “Sorry, I said that to get a rise out of you.”
