Page 45 of Cilka's Journey
“But—”
“I do think you’ve done the right thing, and I’ll take a look at the patient, but I can’t guarantee there won’t be consequences for you. Remember what I said? You two go. It’s time to finish up and I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“You won’t get in trouble, will you?” Cilka asks Yelena.
“No. I’ll try and make it look like he recovered on his own,” she says.
Cilka looks down at the bewildered man lying in the bed.
“You’ll be fine, Isaac. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
Cilka and Josie go to get their coats, their scarves, their hats.
That night, Cilka hardly sleeps. How can saving a man be a problem? Why is it that her life always pushes her to be confronted by, or to embrace, the deaths of others? Why is it that, even if she tries, she cannot change this? Is there any point ever getting attached to another person—Josie? Yelena? They are always in danger.
When Cilka arrives on the ward the next morning, she is greeted by Gleb Vitalyevich and a bulky-looking trustie thug.
“I want her out of here,” he screams on seeing Cilka.
The trustie moves toward her.
“She’s an interfering, mixed-upzechkawho does nothing here of any lasting good. She’d be of better use in the mines.”
Yelena and the other staff stand back watching the rant. Cilka looks pleadingly at Yelena. She shakes her head, indicating there is nothing she can do. Josie stands close behind Cilka, silently supporting her.
The trustie grips Cilka’s upper arm, steering her to the door.
“It’ll be all right,” Cilka calls out to Josie.
“She is going,” Gleb Vitalyevich says. “Now, the rest of you get back to work.”
Cilka glances at Bed 9 and sees Isaac sitting up. She throws him a quick smile as she is forced out of the ward. The trustie follows her all the way to her hut.
CHAPTER 12
The next morning at roll call Josie keeps looking at Cilka, and then at Antonina Karpovna, as Klavdiya Arsenyevna barks out their names. They stand in ankle-deep snow. Cilka looks back at Josie’s questioning eyes beneath the lace detail on her hat. When Josie turns back to Antonina, the searchlight casts a patterned shadow across her pale cheek. Cilka knows Josie is wondering when she is going to tell Antonina she has to put her back on another work detail. As Josie leaves the hut to head toward the hospital, Cilka falls into line with her.
“What are you doing, Cilka? You can’t come back,” Josie says, worried. Cilka did not tell their hut-mates last night why she’d been back early; she’d feigned illness.
“I assumed you just weren’t ready to tell everyone yesterday—I didn’t know you would try to come back!” Josie says.
“I am going to stand up for myself,” Cilka says. “I did nothing wrong, I deserve to have my job back.”
She is surprising even herself, but something became clear to her overnight. She will no longer accept death, which is all around her, as inevitable.
“You’ll get thrown in the hole! Please, Cilka, go back. Don’t do this.”
“I’ll be all right, Josie. I just need your help.”
“I can’t.Idon’t want to go back to working at the mine. I’ll die there. Please, Cilka.”
“Just this one thing. I’ll wait outside. You go in and find Yelena Georgiyevna, ask her to come outside and talk to me. That’s all. I won’t walk into the hospital with you. No one but the doctor will know I’m here.”
“What if she’s not there? What if she’s busy?”
“I’ll wait for a while, and if she doesn’t come out, I’ll go back to the hut and think of something else.”
She has a good enough relationship with Antonina Karpovna by now, having lined her stomach with hospital food just like her hut-mates, so there’s a certain amount she can get away with. As long as Antonina also keeps the guard Klavdiya Arsenyevna happy.
