Page 30 of Jax
They didn’t know they’d just handed me more intel than I’d expected to get in one afternoon. And the best part? They thought I was scared. Let them. Fear made people talk.
After the backyardrecon and the lemonade interrogation, I headed back to my room, planning to lock the door and recite my mental blueprint until I could see every exit with my eyes closed. That was the plan.
But then Maddy, all cleaned up from the earlier gardening, caught me walking by the living room and said, “You look like someone who hasn’t had her nails done in a war zone,” and before I knew it, I was sitting cross-legged on the couch while she sorted through a small basket of nail polish like it was a tactical kit.
“Pick your poison,” she finally said, fanning out a range of colors that all looked like something I wouldn’t normally touch with a ten-foot pole.
“I don’t really do nail polish,” I muttered, glancing toward the front door like it might open and let me escape.
“Too bad,” Bellamy called from the kitchen. “You’ve officially been drafted.”
She came around the corner a moment later with a bowl of popcorn in one hand and a smirk that said she was far too pleased with herself. Her hair was piled on top of her head like she didn’t give a shit about appearances, and somehow she still looked better than most people did on red carpets.
Maddy tapped my knee with a nail file. “C’mon. I’ve got a shade called ‘Gunmetal Tease.’ You’ll like it.”
I gave her a look. “That sounds like a stripper who moonlights as a hitman.”
“Exactly,” she said brightly, unscrewing the cap. “My kind of woman.”
I couldn’t help it. I laughed. Just a little. Too fast, too loud, like it startled me on the way out.
Bellamy flopped into the armchair across from us, watching as Maddy began applying the polish to my nails with careful precision. “Don’t let her paint hearts on your pinky. That’s how she gets you.”
“You’re just jealous,” Maddy said, blowing lightly on my fingers. “Some of us know how to spread joy.”
I watched them. These two women, who had every reason to be shattered, but still managed to tease and push and laugh like the world hadn’t knocked their teeth out. They were starting to feel like more than strangers already. And that scared the shit out of me. Because for a second, just one, I wasn’t thinking about the fence line. I wasn’t calculating the best time to test the lock on the sliding glass door. I wasn’t counting how long it took Deacon to finish his shift before Sully took over. I was just here. Breathing. Laughing. Pretending.
“I used to do this with my sister,” Maddy said softly, brushing the last coat on. “Back when we thought high school was the worst thing that could happen to us.”
Bellamy didn’t look up, but her voice was gentle. “I always hated nail polish. Still kind of do. But I let Maddy do it once when we were having a girl’s movie night. Said it made her feel normal.”
“Did it?” I asked before I could stop myself.
Maddy smiled. “No. But it made me feel seen.”
That word.Seen.It landed too deep, lodged like shrapnel somewhere behind my ribs. I swallowed it down, smiled like I meant it, and flexed my fingers. The polish shimmered in the light.
“Gunmetal Tease,” I said, shaking my head. “Sounds like a weaponized flirtation tactic.”
Maddy grinned. “That’s the idea.”
Bellamy kicked her feet up on the ottoman. “If you’re flirting with anyone in this house, aim high. Sully’s sweet, but Carrick knows what to do with a woman.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Speaking from experience?”
She didn’t blush. Didn’t look away. Just gave a lazy smile and said, “Let’s just say, if he comes up for air tonight, I’ll let you know.”
Maddy let out a gasp-laugh and covered her mouth with one hand. “Bellamy!”
Bellamy shrugged, pointing at me. “What? She brought up the flirting.”
I rolled my eyes, but the heat in my cheeks betrayed me.
That was the danger. The seduction of comfort. The illusion of being normal again. It slipped in through soft laughter and shiny nails and bowls of popcorn shared between women who had every reason to hate the world, and didn’t.
I should’ve been focused. I should’ve been building a case file in my head on every single one of them.
Instead, I felt like I was falling.
