Page 40 of The Wolf's Bullied Mate
I really felt like a father today.
I didn’t care that Ray wasn’t my son. I was already growing attached to him. He was Pauline’s child, and that fact mattered to me. Everything Pauline cared for I would love as well—simple as that.
We spent some genuine quality time together. For the first time in a while I wholeheartedly felt the warmth of being a family with Pauline and Ray by my side. I hoped I could hold on to this feeling forever.
Yet I still had to figure out how to keep making up for my past misdeeds to Pauline.
***
When we returned home, Pauline laid Ray down to sleep. Then she and I sat in the living room, sipping hot chocolate.
“Can I ask you about something related to your visions?” I couldn’t stifle my curiosity when it came to Pauline’s talents. Iknew so little about them, after all. I hoped if I learned more, I would understand her better.
Pauline hesitated for a moment, turning the cup this and that way in her hands. After a moment, she spoke. “Yes, what would you like to know?” She gave me a curious look.
“What kinds of visions do you have exactly?” I asked.
“If you’re asking about categories of visions, there are none, really,” she said. “I just… see something in the future that pushes me towards a decision in the present. One thing is constant about my visions—they always come true, so I can’t ignore them unless I want something bad to happen to me and Ray.”
“So that vision about you being chased by wolves—that’s going to happen regardless of what you do,” I gave her an alarmed look.
“Yes, it will,” she nodded. “But the vision’s feeling was clear—as long as I stick close to you, nothing bad will happen to me and Ray.”
“I can’t be around you all the time, though,” I said. “I’m at work, you’re at work, Ray’s at the kindergarten….”
“But at the time I’m going to be chased by wolves, I’m going to be with Ray, and you’re going to come to my rescue,” she said calmly.
I shook my head. “Is it that simple?”
“That’s what the vision showed me. The visions always come true,” she repeated.
“Have the visions often protected you from bad events in the past?” I asked the next question that popped up in my mind.
“As long as I didn’t ignore them, yes,” she said. “I detested them as a teenager, but when I moved out to Lone Bite, I learned to understand and follow their directions better. They are a gift from the Moon Goddess. They should be cherished, not hated. The visions don’t protect me from bad outcomes directly, butthey tell me how to move toward a better future. For that aid, I’m grateful to the Goddess.”
I nodded. I looked down at the cup in my hands, swirling the warm liquid around. “I’m sorry for calling you a freak.”
Pauline shook her head. “In a sense you’re right. The visions make me odd. I could indeed be called a freak of nature.”
I looked back at her. The way she so easily brought herself down made me wonder—was the bullying at our school the only time she had been abused? Sometimes, she had this grimness to her, like she carried an indescribable burden. My intuition told me there was more to Pauline’s story.
I didn’t want to imagine she had endured further bullying, but I had to make sure. “Pauline, please tell me: was the bullying you suffered at our school the only abuse you went through?”
I knew I had made a mistake as soon as the words left my mouth. Pauline froze, like a deer in the headlights. Before I could say she didn’t have to answer my question, she rose from her seat and bolted out of the room.
I didn’t chase after her. The fact she had run away from me again when I asked her a difficult question told me all I needed to know about the matter. Anger boiled in my heart. My hunch had to be right. Pauline had definitely been abused by other people besides the kids at our school. Had Ray’s father done it to her? Or someone else? What had pushed her to finally use me as a way to get away from Lone Bite?
“Fuck,” I put the cup aside and clenched my fists. I wanted to punch something. I wanted to use all this angry energy to right all the wrongs against Pauline.
How could such a wonderful woman have suffered so much?
What could I do to make her world right for her again?
I knew at this moment, even more certainly than before—I loved Pauline. I wanted her to be my mate. I wanted to spend forever with her.
I just hoped she would welcome me to stay by her side one day.
Chapter 13 - Pauline
