Page 150 of The Princesses of Ruin
He wouldn’t know. He found his wife in the dirt and dug for her. Why not me?
I push him aside and drop to my knees, lifting jagged edges stained red with her blood.
“Zane, it’syour blood,” a feminine voice calls from above.
One more stone and surely I’ll find her.
But there are no more. It’s only hot earth, seared orange by the power of the magic that was held inside her. It shimmers gold, green, and teal blue.
Someone grabs my arm and pulls me upright. Alastair holds my hand in front of my face and I see what I’ve done. Gnarled, bloodied down to the sinew, and burned.
“She’s not down there,” he says, his voice coarse and quiet.
I see the truth in his eyes, the pain of loss that I’m refusing to feel. Because if she’s not gone, I don’t have to acknowledge the deep, hollow ache in my heart—in my soul. I’m not just alone without her, I’m a shadow. A husk of what could’ve been. An empty shell, shattered irrevocably, that can never again be filled.
I’m gasping for air. My lungs are too tight, too small.
I should’ve jumped in with her. I should’ve died with her.
I know what I must do.
My spindles snap out at the awkward angle required to sever my own neck. Alastair releases my hand and grabs the top two. He wrestles me to the ground, pinning the others against the hot stones.
I thrash, but he’s much heavier. Even with the power of my spindles pushing against the ground and the upper two battling his scaled arms, he doesn’t budge.
“Don’t!” he barks in my face.
The dam on my throat opens and hatred spills out. “You would condemn me to a life without her?”
“Think of your nieces! Your wife’s blood runs in their veins! You’d leave them unprotected? What would she think of you?”
“How dare you invoke her this way! Like athingto beused!”
I get my knee between us and shove with all my might. He loses his grip. Fury moves me. I stagger to my feet. My spindles slash his hard scales and come back bloody. Alastair grips one and twists, throwing me from the ground to the wall. My shoulder screams, but I push through the bodily pain, fueled by the one that’s deeper.
I lunge for him, my spider legs narrowed to spear tips. They pierce his armor at the shoulders and he falls against the stone.
I’m punched in the gut by some invisible force. It throws me back and sucks the breath from my lungs. I hit the wall with a sickening crack and stay there. The weight on my body is unbearable. I want to scream, but there’s nothing left in me. I have to suffer this helplessness for too many seconds, realizing who the culprit is.
Kazimir stands at the open rim of the pit, his hands twirling violet magic. I bare my teeth, the only gesture I can manage to let him know that if he doesn’t kill me now, I will kill him when I wake.
Finally, blessed darkness takes me. I hope for the very last time.
I feel the sheets beneath me before I know of anything else. It’s still cold, and my body still aches, but it’s somewhere just this side of tolerable. I open my eyes. They take a long time to focus, but when they do, I see Adrik.
His head is leaned against a cracked wall, body slumped in a way that could be death or sleep. He’s emaciated. His muscles were nearly ruined from the potions he used to amplify his body’s power. I told him it would happen. He told me he didn’t care. If it meant protecting the people he loved, he would die.
My throat tightens and I wonder if Kazimir is nearby, ready to choke me again if I lose my mind.
I call on my power, and sure enough, it’s blocked. I can’t feel where they’ve put the enchanted copper. Too much of my body hurts to move and find the shackles. So I sit in painful consciousness, looking at the ruined room of the Nest. It’s obvious Lily has been mending things, but with speed and inaccuracy.
How long has it been?
“Five days.”
Alyse’s presence shouldn’t surprise me, but her voice makes me flinch.
“You’re not well enough yet. Sleep.”
