Page 125 of Tortured Soul
“Lola,” he said softly. “I’m sorry if what I asked you came across as inappropriate. I was only trying to suggest that you guys spend time together. I was hoping to awaken the somehow dormant mating link inside you while also trying to make a point with Arc’s obvious lack of balance between his two sides. The sex part was only a poor attempt at lightening the mood, as I knew you guys were attracted to each other.”
He paused, tilting his head to try and catch my gaze. If he tried to hear my mind now, it would probably be a maze of disparaging thoughts.
“But Lola, you have to understand that when I mentioned the need for Arc to loosen the leash on his demon, it was to avoid what happened in that alley. He didn’t tell me about it, but seeing it in your mind? If someone other than Carter or you had been here, it would have been utter panic. What sane demon would trust an Immortal being capable of destroying them without breaking a sweat?”
“Don’t you trust him?” I gritted out.
He chuckled, shaking his head. A few strands fell over his eyes and he pushed them out of his face with his free hand, squeezing mine a little tighter with the other.
“Arc and I have known each other for a really long time. I’ve seen him go through a lot, always one of his side leading while the other was repressed. And let me tell you, even though he lacks balance now, when his demon is holding the reins? It’s not a pretty sight. I tried for years to help him find stability, but I could always feel that something was missing, preventing him from finding his footing. And when you showed up, I thought you could be the key.
“His mate. He thought he’d never have one for the longest time, and then, he had a vision. He saw himself connected to another soul, and that soul connected to others. I don’t think you realize how long he’s been waiting for you. Hoping for you. For his mate. He spent the majority of his life on his own and hunted down by both sides for what he was. Is it really wrong of me to wish that my friend finally finds his place? His peace? The piece of his soul that he’s always been longing for?”
It wasn’t. If I had managed to keep any friends other than Dimitri over the long centuries I’ve lived, I would have wanted them to be happy too. Especially if they always felt out of place.
“But I’m sorry,” Kai continued. “For making you uncomfortable. I won’t apologize for not telling you, though. It wasn’t my secret to share.”
I gave him a noncommittal grunt.
“Are you still upset?” he asked.
“I need you to promise not to look through my head anymore,” I said. “I thought Archdemons could only do that to their tie groups. I thought I could finally let my damn mind breathe now that I was free.”
Something akin to pain crossed over his face, but he nodded anyway.
“And don’t do that to Dimitri either,” I added, my voice lower.
He scoffed, leaning back into his chair and letting go of my hand. “I haven’t had the pleasure to officially meet him but yeah, I don’t want to get stuck into a mad mind, thank you.”
At least he was aware about the risk of rummaging through a Nephilim’s head.
“Plus, isn’t his Immortal parent a Divine?”
“Indeed,” I confirmed. “But since there are sometimes Vampires in demonic tie groups and you confirmed you had the renowned but elusiveVladimir Maartosin yours for a while, I wondered if maybe you could also hear Divine blooded Immortals.”
He shook his head, crossing his hands over his stomach casually.
“Vampires who join tie groups do it of their own free will. I’ve never been able to hear any thoughts coming from them.”
That must have been complicated. Archdemons liked to control everything that happened. That explained why very few of them actually had Vampires.
But again, Kai seemed different from all the other ones I’d worked for.
“Do you mind me asking something?” His voice sounded a bit uncertain. I nodded. “Ann mentioned that you’ve been distant the last couple of days.” A knot formed in my stomach. “When she came to visit you in the archives as she enjoyed doing since you arrived, you’ve barely spoken to her. Is there something wrong? She’s been really upset about that.”
My eyes focused on the bookshelves to the side, taking everything to not look at him directly.
“Is it because of me?” he prodded further.
“It’s not.” I sighed. “I’m figuring things out, and I’m not ready to talk or confront people about it.”
He seemed to ponder on that for a while, maybe forcing himself not to look through my mind for a more direct answer. I dared him to, lifting an eyebrow in his direction.
The sound of his throat clearing was loud in the silence around us.
“Alright.” He forced a smile. “Just know that she cares about you. You should talk to her, I’m sure it’s a misunderstanding.”
Maybe it was. But I couldn’t shake the feeling that something wasn’tright.
