Page 58 of Score to Settle
I see it so clearly. Of course Jake was trying to help. Of course he didn’t ruin the careers of four other people. This man standing before me is good. He thinks of others before himself.He puts them first. Everything he’s done in the last month has shown me that.
“Not that it mattered,” Jake continues. “The two cheerleaders still got fired. Cheerleaders have to sign NDAs so even after they were fired, they couldn’t say publicly who the football player was they were sleeping with. Kylie barely held on to her job and quit two months later anyway.
“Coach Allen asked me if I was prepared to tell him who the player was, and stupidly I said no. Gordon had come to me the night before and begged me to stay quiet. He swore it was a mistake and he wouldn’t do it again. He was a mess, crying, saying he’d be nothing if he got fired. I didn’t like Gordon then any more than I like him now, but I couldn’t see what good it would do to throw him under the bus. So I told Coach I wouldn’t. He understood my loyalty but felt he had to bench me for a game.”
“Even though you did nothing wrong?”
Jake shrugs. “I was pissed, but mostly with myself and how stupid the situation was. I thought it was only one game. What difference could it make?”
Another cold shot of realization pushes through me. “Dylan,” I whisper.
It’s not a question, but Jake gives a small nod.
“That was the game you weren’t playing in,” I say. “The one where he tore his ACL. But his injury wasn’t your fault.”
“Dylan doesn’t see it that way. The way we read each other on the field was nothing short of magic. Dylan thinks if I’d played that game, I’d have protected him from the tackle that ruined his knee, and the worst thing is, he’s probably right.”
“Does he know what really happened with the cheerleaders? That it wasn’t your fault?”
“I told Mama not to say anything. Dylan was in a bad way after the injury. I thought at some point we’d talk and I’d explain, but we never have. He’s still furious with me.”
Jake steps toward me. I think he’s going to reach for my hand, but instead he moves into the hall.
“I’m going to bed,” he says when he reaches the stairs.
“Jake?” I say his name with no idea what will come next.
He pauses, turning to look at me.
“I’m sorry for flirting with Gordon,” I blurt, unable to voice my feelings.
His eyes fill with regret. “Harper, since we met, have you seen any evidence that I think only with my dick?”
I shake my head.
“Because I don’t.” He pushes a hand through his hair. “There aren’t many things I regret, but I regret that day in the parking lot last September and Dylan getting injured. I regret not standing up for myself and letting my reputation take the hit. And I regret letting you walk away the morning after the awards dinner without telling you how I was feeling.”
My heart feels like it skips a beat. “How were you feeling?” I ask, the words barely a whisper.
“I didn’t want what happened to be a one-night stand with you because…” He pauses and I watch the column of his throat move before he continues. “Because I’m falling for you. Your humor, your smart-ass mouth,” he says with a small smirk. “You see through all the bullshit. You’re smart and unbelievably sexy and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since you walked into my life in those stupid sky-high stilettos.”
My mouth drops open. His words hit me with a force that takes my breath away. I search for a reply, but Jake continues.
“But you don’t trust me, and even though it kills me, there’s nothing I can do about that.”
He turns away and walks up the stairs. A moment later his bedroom door shuts and I’m alone. I stand in the hallway, my heart racing as Jake’s words echo in my mind. I think of the times we’ve spent together. The teasing banter, the charged looks, and the way he searches for me on the field between plays. That smile on his lips when our eyes locked across the stadium earlier.
I sigh and lean back against the wall. Part of me aches to be back in Jake’s arms. But another part of me is terrified to let him in. I’ve hardly had the best track record. Pining for Jake when I was sixteen. Then a handful of unsatisfactory boys who all treated me like I didn’t matter. Then Scott and his cheating. I thought Jake was to blame for my low confidence after high school and the crappy love life that followed, but the truth is, I never allowed men in previous relationships to see the real me. Never let myself be vulnerable. To risk getting hurt.
I don’t know how. Or if I’m even capable.
With a groan, I push away from the wall and head up to my room. I slip on my ivory camisole and shorts set and pad to the bathroom to brush my teeth. In the mirror I stare at my reflection and the truth staring back at me. My heart is on the line, but if I’m honest, I’m already in too deep. If I walk away from Jake now, I know it’ll hurt.
An urgency starts to pound in my chest. Seven days. That’s all the time we have left on the assignment. Suddenly, I have to tell him the words he needs to hear. I throw open the door and step into the hall, only to find Jake already in the doorway to his bedroom, looking as tormented as I feel.
“I trust you,” I blurt.
“Really?” A frown is pinching his brow, but he’s smiling too. “You’re not just saying that to get me into bed again?”
