Page 7 of Enzo
We scrub in and I try not to think about the fact I’m about to watch the love of my life fight forhislife.
Doc bulldozes his way into the operating room and I take a long breath before following. It’s…chaos. So many people in such a small space. Doc and I try to stay out of the way, andI’m glad for the mask covering my face that’s now absorbing the tears steadily running down my cheeks.
We stand off to the side, to keep out of the way as they work on saving my love. Words are thrown around in clipped voices, and I try hard to pay attention to what they’re saying, but everything is going in one ear and out the other as I glance between the monitors and the glimpses I get of Enzo’s ashen face as they work on him.
When he flatlines, my knees almost give out and a strangled sound leaves my throat. They jump into action, and though they’re able to bring him around quickly, it doesn’t stop my own heart from giving a little jolt as I’m faced with the reality that he might not survive this.
Doc glances at me, though I keep my focus on Enzo. “You can leave if you need to,” he says gently. “Go wait with James.”
I hate the sympathy in his voice, as if he’s already buried Enzo while he’s still on the table.
Shaking my head, I reply, “I’m okay.”
Before Doc can say anything else, the head trauma surgeon calls Doc over to start cauterizing Enzo’s blood vessels, and I fight back a sob as more tears flow down my face. For the first time in my career I hate what I do, because it means I understand far more than I want to about what’s happening.
Though some of the more complex terms and procedures go over my head as the surgeons work on saving what’s left of his leg, I can understand enough that my entire being starts to shake.
Doc steps back from his task and looks over at me. “Go give James an update, and text Rose to find out how Roman’s doing. Also, ask James to track down some coffee. We’re in for a long few days.”
I don’t hesitate, needing the breather he’s giving me. “Yes, sir.”
Casting one last long glance at Enzo’s prone form, surrounded by doctors and nurses, I swallow and hope to a God I don’t believe in that this isn’t my last glimpse of him alive.
I findJames in the waiting room for the surgical floor and he jumps up when he sees me. His dark brown eyes are full of worry, and his auburn hair is in disarray as though he’s been pulling at it.
As a bodyguard, this has to hit close to home. Not only are James and Enzo friends, but James is uniquely aware that his job comes with risks, that today it might be Enzo, but it could easily have been him on the table fighting for his life.
“How is he?”
I shake my head. “He…they’re having to amputate his leg.” I let out a sob, wrapping an arm around my middle.
James crosses the space between us and pulls me into his arms, holding me tightly. “He’s strong. He’ll make it through this.”
Clinging to James’s shirt, I cry, letting the torrent of pain crash over me after having to hold myself back for so long lest they kick me out of the operating room.
When my tears subside and the only sounds I can make are little whimpers, I pull back, but still stay in the comfort of James’s embrace. “I…I need to call Rose and get an update on Roman. And the Boss needs to be informed about Enzo.”
“I can do all that. You sit and take a few minutes for yourself.”
“Doc wants coffee.”
James huffs. “Yeah, I think we all need that. Sit, and don’t worry about anything.”
Guiding me to one of the seats in the room, James urges me to sit down, and I copy his movements as he takes a few deep breaths.
When he’s satisfied I’m not going to fall apart, he steps back and moves to the corner of the room, pulling his phone out.
Wrapping an arm around myself, I close my eyes, tuning James’s low voice out because I can’t handle hearing him give our Boss updates.
Fuck. How did it all go so wrong? I’m not stupid; I know the risks of the job. Doc, Rose, and I have patched up many of the guards who work for the Family, but this… This wasn’t supposed to happen. Not to Enzo.
Please. This isn’t it. This isn’t how our story ends. Please, baby, don’t leave me...
Time is meaningless. I don’t go back into the operating room, knowing I can’t handle seeing him like that. Though part of me rebels against the thought of not being there should the worst happen, I have to trust the doctors… I have to trust Doc. He’s never lost a patient before, and I know he won’t start with Enzo. It doesn’t matter if he’s not the one working on my love, I trust my boss and friend with my life.
James brings me coffee, but I don’t drink it, though the heat emitting from the cup helps let me know I’m still alive.
“Kail.” My name being called has me looking up, and I almost drop the coffee when I see my father standing in the doorway.
