Page 31 of Enzo
I give him as gentle a smile as I can. “This life ain’t fair, kid. You know that. But we all have our roles to play. One day, you’re gonna take over, and you’re gonna be the best Boss this Family has ever seen. You know why? Because you care about the people who work for you.
“And me? I was never gonna be able to guard you forever. It happened sooner than I’d have liked, but that was always a risk I was willing to take.
“I knew what I was gettin’ into when I took the job. I can tell you now, it was an honor serving you. Plus, I get bragging rights. Do you know how many men would kill to be in my position?” He rolls his eyes and scoffs, but we both know I’m right. Being not only part of the guard for the main Family, butRoman’sguard specifically? There’s no higher honor.
“I led your guard, Roman. I got to work closely with your lover over there. Not many people have that privilege. And itisaprivilege. We all have a goal in this line of work, and mine was to be the best damn guard I could be. I happened to go further than most people and had a career they could only dream of. So don’t be sorry for me.”
“But your leg…”
I swallow at the reminder and can’t help but sigh. “Yeah. I won’t lie and say that’s not a kick to the teeth, but not for the reason you think. I’m upset because it altered a part of me, but it also cost me my job. I can’t help but worry about what’s going to happen to you without me.”
And I realize that’s the truth. I’ve accepted that having only one leg has altered my life and will make things more difficult for me, but I have a great team of professionals behind me to help. What I can’t deal with? What keeps me up at night, even after a long day that should have me exhausted?
I don’t know what to do with myself now that I don’t have Roman to protect. I don’t want to be so shallow to say my entire life revolves around him and the job, but…it did. Being someone’s full-time bodyguard isn’t for the faint of heart, and not having that anymore? It’s a reality I’ve been fighting with since I woke up from surgery.
As if sensing my tailspin, Roman squeezes my hand. “I’m doing okay. Benji’s got me. And Dante has been great. Thomas is…Thomas. So don’t worry.”
I snort but I understand what he means. His guard is solid, and I couldn’t have picked a better group to step up, but that doesn’t make it any easier.
“I’ll always worry about you, kid. But you have a good team behind you, and that’s all I could ever ask for.”
Roman is quiet for a long moment as he assesses me. His tears have dried, and I can see the intelligence he’s good at hiding sparkle in his dark green eyes. Carefully, as if choosing his words with intent, he asks, “Will you come work for me?When you’re all better. I… I don’t want to lose you, and I don’t know what a former mafia bodyguard can do after being injured on the job, but I don’t want anyone else in charge of my security. Except for Tennant, of course. If he and Dad agree, will you stay on? And not just for me, but maybe you can coordinate with Ten and keep everyone’s security in line.”
His words take my breath away and I have to swallow back my own tears. It’s not official, and there are a lot of things that would have to happen, such as Tennant giving his approval, because even though Roman is making the offer, he’s still Head of Security, and probably will be long after the Boss retires. Still, a kernel of hope rises in me, that maybe the future won’t be as bleak as I’ve been predicting.
“I don’t even have to think about it. Yes! I told you, I’m not done. Out of the field? Yes, but definitely not done.”
Tears fill his eyes once more, but he manages to hold them back. “I’m sorry.” I open my mouth to protest, but he shakes his head. “No, let me say this. I’m sorry you got hurt because of me. I care about all of you, and maybe I shouldn’t because I understand there’s more bodyguards and only one of me, but that doesn’t make it any easier. I hate knowing that people would die for me. I also understand my job, my position, is important. I know the role I play as the future Boss, and it’s one I take seriously. So thank you for doing everything you could to make sure I’m alive to play that role.”
“I’d say anytime, but I think one leg is enough.”
That earns me a weak laugh. “You’re really doing okay?”
“Yeah, kid, I am. Just finished physical therapy a bit ago, which is why I’m here in bed. Shit wipes me out. But you know Jayden’s the best, and I’m better now than I was a week ago, let alone when all this started.”
He tilts his head as he asks, “How’d this come about anyway? You being here in Doc’s house.”
I can’t hold back my eye roll over the whole situation. “Fucker didn’t trust me at home, and both he and your father thought a rehabilitation center would piss me off—they were correct. So, for now I’m here. The PT comes in once a day, and Kail is here twenty-four seven to care for me.”
Roman’s eyes narrow a little when I say Kail’s name, but I pretend I don’t see it. Tennant smirks a little behind his lover, and I work on keeping my expression impassive. Now isn’t the time to make Roman feel worse than he already does by letting him in on my private life.
“It’s not a bad setup,” I tell him. “Just… I’m used to working, used to knowing where you are and what you’re doing. If I’m being honest, that adjustment is harder than learning to live with one leg.”
“That can’t be true.”
“Yes and no. I won’t lie and say it’s been a fucking picnic, but I was always prepared for the possibility of being injured on duty. I just didn’t realize how much of my time was dedicated to you.” I narrow my eyes at him, stopping whatever he has to say. “And if you apologize for that, I’ll ask Mr. Mason to shoot you.”
That earns me a laugh, which is what I was aiming for. I don’t need any more of Roman’s guilt. And I’m not lying to him, not completely. He doesn’t need to know the dark hole of helplessness I’d fallen into at the knowledge this injury was the end of the road for me career-wise. But having his offer helps, more than I’ll ever confess to.
“You don’t have to worry about me, Roman.” I give his hand another squeeze.
“You can’t stop me. I am better than I was right after everything happened, but… I still struggle sometimes. Not just because of this, but everything that comes with being who I am. I’m working on it, though.”
“Good.” I can’t imagine the pressure that comes with being heir to the Family. For someone so young, Roman holds himself with grace and dignity, and as his guard I’m proud of him. I know his fathers are too. He’ll make a great Boss one day, and it’ll be my greatest honor to serve him.
“Can I come see you again?”
I give him a genuine smile. “I’d like that.”
