Page 354 of Shadowblood Souls
“I think all of us have had issues getting control over our powers. The guardians never really taught us how to use them properly.”
Clancy’s done a little work with us, but only to serve his missions. I don’t know if he’s even bothered with this kid.
George lets out a soft huff. “Yeah, well, no one else made the helicopter crash.”
I consider his statement. “No, but a bunch of us could have. And some of us would be more likely to screw up in different ways that could be just as bad. As long as… as long as we’retryingto help rather than hurt people, I think we’ll end up doing more good than bad in the end. The balance will be more right than wrong.”
The kid is silent for several seconds. “Are you sure? I do try.”
“As sure as I can be about anything,” I say, and realize as I’m saying it how true that is.
Is this the first time I’ve thought of my own mistakes and not immediately started beating myself up over them?
I’m not happy about my fuck-ups. I wish I could take back the pain I’ve dealt out that wasn’t deserved.
But I didn’t ask for this power or the feral defensiveness that’s intertwined with it. I can put more good into the world than pain myself, can’t I?
I’m doing a little of that now by giving this kid a hand. And maybe not just by taking some weight off him in the literal sense.
A smile crosses my face, and my own steps feel even lighter. For a little while.
The direction we’ve been heading in, based on Jacob’s observations from the cockpit before the crash and Griffin’s emotional compass, is taking us toward a range of tall hills. Maybe even small mountains, from the looks of the green-draped peaks I’m getting glimpses of through the leaves.
The breaths of my companions become rougher as we veer upward again. How high are we going to have to climb this time?
We can’t count on stumbling on another abandoned hotel for shelter.
I skirt a clump of jutting boulders with the others trailing behind me and knock a path through a grove of sprouting saplings. George sways on my shoulders.
My calves are starting to prickle with exertion now. I’m going to have to put him down soon after all.
I glance up at the sun, just past its peak in the sky and searing even through the thin haze of clouds, and then back at the others. “Are we sure we definitely want to keep going this way? I haven’t gotten us off-course?”
Dominic peers up at the sun too. “I think this is still northwest.”
Griffin nods with that unnervingly vague expression of his. “It feels like we’re going the right way to me, if we want to reach the biggest city around.”
I guess we just keep trudging for as long as it takes, then.
I turn back to face the jungle, debating whether I can handle carrying George a while longer or should preserve my strengthby setting him back on his feet now, and realize one of the other kids has sidled up next to me. The mousy-haired girl looks to be about fourteen, but she’s been so quiet throughout the trek that I haven’t caught her name.
“I, um,” she mumbles, her head dipping shyly. “I think I might be able to tell where we could walk more easily.”
I’m not going to say no to that offer. I smile down at her in an attempt to offset my imposing size, in case that’s part of what’s making her nervous. “How’s that?”
Her hands twist together in front of her. “Well, I—my abilities have to do with the earth. Like, dirt and stuff. And I’ve been noticing I can kind offeelthe ground around us. Where it’s steeper or… not so steep. Where there are more roots in it or less.”
“Less roots would mean less plants to push through,” Booker pipes up. “Sounds good to me.”
Jacob’s voice reaches me with an impatient note. “We don’t want to get too far off track. An easy path could still take longer if we wander off the wrong way.”
Before my eyes, the girl deflates. The sight gnaws at me just like George’s admission of guilt did.
She’s trying to do something good for us too. Jake’s just a natural skeptic.
“Do you think you could tell how far we’d need to go to get to the better routes?” I ask her. “Make sure it’s not too long a diversion?”
She peeks up at me, biting her lip. “Yeah. I can’t feel things very far away anyway. There’s a spot that’s pretty close that we could try.”
