Page 446 of Shadowblood Souls
We’re going to make it back to him—all of us. We’re going to bring Balthazar what he wants and see our friend restored to life.
And the guys around me need to know how true that is too.
I look around the train car again, gathering myself. I don’t think I really move, but Zian pauses in his pacing as if he’s sensed that something’s coming.
I had some idea of making a carefully crafted speech, but when my lips part, the first thing that tumbles out is simply, “I’m sorry.”
Drey grips my hand and tugs it closer to him. Griffin lifts his head with thoughtful intensity.
Jacob’s frown cuts through the shadows. “Sorry? What the hell do you have to be sorry about?”
My head droops, but I keep my shoulders squared. “I—I know I’ve gone a bit off the rails since Balthazar grabbed us. It was so hard to see how we could ever be happy again, and I started shutting down, but I hated that too, and I just…”
I don’t know how to go on. But it turns out I don’t need to.
Andreas wraps his arms right around me. Jacob pushes himself away from the crates and kneels by my side, touching my cheek.
When I meet Jake’s gaze, his eyes are shimmering with anguished passion. “It’s okay, Wildcat. I told you before that you don’t need to be strong all the time, didn’t I? None of us expects you to take all the crap without ever wobbling.”
My throat chokes up. “But I—I haven’t been careful enough. I took risks I shouldn’t have because it was hard to care. What if Balthazar had decided to go ahead andkillDominic?”
“He didn’t,” Griffin says softly. “And you don’t know if he’d have made us this deal if he hadn’t realized you weren’t going to follow his orders perfectly every time, just because he said so.”
Zian lets out a strained grunt and takes a few steps toward me. He stops just behind Jacob, his expression taut. “I don’t know how to make any of this better either, Riva. But we are still in it together. We’re right here with you, no matter what.”
Andreas hugs me and presses a brief kiss to my cheek. “Always. Even when it’s hard. Even if you stumble.”
Their devotion encircles me just as Drey’s embrace has, melting the edges off all the prickly emotions still churning in my chest. My next breath comes a little easier.
I tuck my hand around Andreas’s forearm and reach to grasp Jacob’s arm as well. My gaze lifts from them to the other two guys standing over me. “We have to finish this job, get what he wants, and make it back. For us. For Dominic.”
“We can,” Andreas says firmly. “Because we’re in it together. No one’s ever managed to stop us for long.”
He means not just the guards who’ll stand in our way on this mission but Balthazar as well, though we all know better than to speak our hopes of rebellion that blatantly. I inhale deeply and absorb the warmth of my men’s love down to my bones.
Zian manages a small smile. “We’ve even stolen a laptop before. This is just a hard drive. We’ve got practice.”
I sputter a laugh. “The laptop wasn’t behind a gazillion locks with very living guards standing between us and it—ones we’re not supposed to kill.”
Jacob shrugs. “There are plenty of ways to disable people without murdering them. Balthazar never said we had to leave themhappy.”
The corner of my mouth ticks upward. It’s true—our keeper even gave us direct permission to get “creative.”
I’m not sure why Balthazar is against outright killing the guards, but I can’t say I mind. We have no idea whether they’ve done anything worse than get in the way of a man who’s clearly a sadistic psychopath.
It’s pretty obvious that we aren’t on the side of justice at the moment.
“We shouldn’t hurt them too badly,” I point out.
Griffin nods. “Nothing worse than necessary to get the job done. I’ll be placating them as well as I can the whole time.”
“I know.” I lean into Andreas’s chest for one more fleeting moment and then push to my feet to approach the door.
Tall grass sways in the fields beyond the tracks. When I crane my neck, I can make out the lights of civilization up ahead.
I turn back to the guys. “The town’s in sight. It’s almost time.”
I slide the door mostly closed to hide our presence. The guys gather around me, all of us peeking through the narrow gap as the train sways through a stretch of industrial buildings, apartment complexes, houses, and then more factories.
