Page 375 of Shadowblood Souls
When we have the chance.
As I watch Nadia and then Ajax scale the ladder with obvious reluctance, my heart seems to plummet all the way to the ground.
As difficult as our trek on the mainland was, it was better than this. We deserve to be free.
We aren’t the tools Clancy sees us as or the experimental property we are to most of the other guardians. We’repeople—we shouldn’t be owned by anyone.
We sure as hell don’t owe the Guardianship anything after the hell we’ve already been through at their hands.
Who would Nadia and Ajax and all the others be if they could simply…be? Have the space and peace to explore what a regular human life could look like, on their terms?
I want to give them that, so fucking badly. But I don’t have a clue how.
I’m just reaching for the ladder myself—not that I really want to go through the course, but I’ve got to do something to look like a participant and not a rebel—when the underbrush rustles behind me. “Riva?”
My pulse hiccups before I even glance back. It’s Griffin’s voice, soft and even.
As I turn around, he comes to a stop at the end of the path.
It’s hard to imagine that I confused him with his twin just weeks ago. All I can see now are the ways they differ—the shagginess of Griffin’s slightly longer blond hair in contrast with Jacob’s smoothness, the gentler lines of his face.
The distance in his eyes, as if the whole sky really is contained in their blue irises.
I clamp down on the urge to hug myself. “What’s up?”
His mouth forms a small smile. “I was hoping we could spend a little time together. We haven’t seen each other since… everything. There are some things I’d like to explain.”
Searching his gaze, I grapple with my response. I’m pretty sure he did what he did to protect the rest of us, not because he was the real traitor among us. But not one hundred percent sure.
And either way, I’msupposedto believe he betrayed us. What reaction would the guardians expect to see to keep up that ruse?
I raise one shoulder in a partial shrug. “I’m not interested in hearing your explanations.”
He holds out his hand. “Please. For old time’s sake?”
Have I resisted enough to sell my wariness? I’m also supposed to be trying to cooperate with the new status quo, to avoid me or the other guys getting punished.
I settle for ignoring his hand, as much as I’d like to take it, but stepping toward him. “Fine. What did you have in mind?”
Griffin’s expression twitches as he lowers his hand, a trace of discomfort crossing it that I wouldn’t have expected to see even a week ago. The feelings that’ve woken up inside him haven’t vanished, then.
He motions for me to follow him and doesn’t speak again until we’re partway along the narrow path. “You seemed to enjoy tossing the knives during our last meeting. Clancy agreed to give us private use of the shooting range.”
I press my hand to my mouth to contain a sputter of laughter. “And you’re not worried you’ll end up with a bullet in you?”
Griffin’s tone lightens—just slightly, but any break from his new typical monotone is a relief to hear. “You managed not to stab me last time, so I think my chances are good.”
We cross the stone bridge over the thin but deep river that courses away from the waterfall and climb the damp stone steps to the hidden entrance. The cool spray flecks my skin, sharp against the tropical heat.
Just inside the entrance to the shooting range, with the water rushing down inches away, Griffin stops me with a careful grasp of my wrist. He leans in so I can hear him over the warble of the falls.
“We aren’t being directly monitored here. Clancy went along with a lot of concessions… because he thinks I'm trying to get him the data he wants."
He pushes up one sleeve to reveal a band like the ones the guardians made Zian and me wear—in the hopes of monitoring the forming of our marked connection.
My stomach clenches. “I?—”
“It’s okay,” Griffin murmurs. He takes my hand, interlacing our fingers, and lets out a sigh that speaks of days of bottled tension releasing. “I wouldn’t want to ‘help’ him like that anyway. It just buys us a little privacy. He said it only records physiological data, not voices, but I thought we should be extra careful.”
