Page 132 of Shadowblood Souls
She didn’t ask for her new talent any more than Zian asked for his feral rages or Dominic his growing tentacles.
I have to show her I understand that too.
I turn back to Jacob. “I’m going to take Riva to go pick up supplies at the mall. We need to replace what we lost at the townhouse now that we have a chance.”
Jacob springs to his feet, his gaze immediately twice as intense. “I’ll come with you.”
I hold up my hand, not at all surprised by his declaration. “It’s better if you stay here. Dom’s occupied, and Zian obviously needs a break. Someone needs to be standing guard, right?”
Jacob’s eyes narrow. “The mall is more exposure. If they find you there?—”
I raise my eyebrows. “We’re in the middle of nowhere, four train hops and a drive from the last place the guardians couldlocate us. And if they find us anyway, Riva can look after herself.”
“But—”
“Jake,” I say, and he stops at the firmness of my tone.
I hesitate, because this isn’t the kind of thing we’ve normally talked about. It isn’t the kind of thing we’ve normally beenableto talk about with the guardians watching over us in the facility and charting every weakness.
But I suspect it’d be good if we were all a little more honest about how we feel.
“I screwed up with her,” I say quietly. “In some ways worse than you did. I need to take my chances to make it up to her when I can get them.”
Jacob’s jaw tightens, but he lowers his eyes at the same time, looking vaguely abashed.
“Fine,” he mutters. “Get more phones too. If we’re going to be splitting up sometimes, we need to be able to reach each other.”
I nod. “Totally agreed. Thank you.”
His gaze flicks back to me, his pale blue eyes now stormy. “Just don’t be gone too long.”
I grab some of the money from our stash and knock on the door to Riva’s room. My gut clenches in apprehension about her response before her voice calls out, clear but hesitant. “You can come in.”
She can probably sense that it’s me just like I’m aware of her presence beyond the door. I ease it open to see her setting down the TV remote next to her where she’s poised in the middle of the bed.
I felt her there and she’s been at the forefront of my mind for days, but seeing her directly sends an extra jolt of anguished affection through my heart.
She looks so small and delicate with her hoodie hugged tight around her and her shoulders warily hunched. Her skin shinesnearly as pale as the silvery strands of her hair that twine with the darker gray underneath.
She flips her braid over her shoulder and studies me with her bright brown eyes. They gleam with feline alertness even when she’s in fully human form.
Riva isn’t weak or fragile, not really. I’ve seen so many times how much strength her tiny frame contains.
But somehow that knowledge makes it worse. She endured so much from us, took the accusations and the venom—both metaphorical and literal—and even when she finally cracked, her first instinct was to sacrifice herself to save us.
It’s hard to imagine how we let ourselves question her devotion. I have to find a way to show just how devoted to herIcan be.
I don’t care how vicious her new abilities are or how well she can control them. It doesn’t matter if she ends up hurting me by accident.
Anything she could deal out would be worth it just to stand by her side like I should have to begin with.
“I’m going to that mall we passed to pick up some changes of clothes for all of us and a few other things,” I say. “Do you want to come along? I figured you might like getting to choose your own outfits this time.”
Riva blinks, and that flash of startled emotion flits across her face again. The last time we bought new clothes, Jacob forced her to stay back in the car under guard.
And I let him get away with it.
She unfolds her limbs with her usual careful grace and pushes herself off the bed. “All right. I would like that.”
