Page 21 of Under the Influence
My stomach lurches. He knows about the surprise I intended for Leighton. Punishing me out of spite. Which is so like him. I've witnessed the vengeful streak in his reactions before. Directed toward others who disappoint him. I guess I never thought I'd be one of them. I never thought he would care. "Why are youhere?"
"I told you lastnight."
He licks his lips. Seemingly involuntary and his gaze sweeps over me. Hunger I know all too well flashes in his darkening expression from the reminder of ourmistake.
Danger.
Much too dangerous to be alone with him. I can't trust him. Hell, I can't trustmyself.
My hands shake as I push away from the table. His reaction is just as fast, and he hops up too. Making the cheap wooden legs wobble from the force. My empty glass tips over onto the scratched Formica top, rolling in an endless circle. Stuck in the same useless path. Just like us. I back away. Trying to keep him from gaining on me. But I fail and my fingers brush his smooth skin when he corners me. The warm muscles, inked with a flame tattoo he didn’t have before, flex under my fingertips. I can't breathe. "You need togo."
His head twists from my whisper, and his hands slam the wall on both sides of me. Trapping me in a heavenly prison. He would never hurt me. Not physicallyanyway.
“New rule. If you run, then I fuck you when I catchyou.”
I can't keep myself from shuddering. Furious with my body for blazing from his threat. “I’m not playing yourgame.”
The fist curled next to my cheek opens, and he caresses my skin. Not gentle like before. Rough fingertips drag down my throat with an intensity that makes me shiver again before his thumb strokes over my collar bone. Squeezing enough to make my breaths blow even heavier. My thighs clench together just astight.
“It’s not a game angel.” His body floats over mine, and his lips skim my earlobe, making it almost impossible to think. To argue back. To remember that I want him gone. “We talk or we fuck. Hopefullyboth.”
Forcing my heavy eyes open, I meet his. “I don’t understand. Why would you want to sleep with someone as boring asme?”
My question catches him off guard. Surprise lifting his eyebrows before his face falls blank again. Too late. He can’t hide the emotion I garner from him with my insolence. I refuse to give in to mydesire.
“You’re not boring. I’m sorry I said that. I didn’t meanit.”
Shock fills me. The third time he's apologized in less than eighteen hours. While I don't think he ever did once when we were together. Seeking my forgiveness for his indiscretions with flowers and books and sex rather than words. “Whatdidyou mean then? Did you mean to humiliate me? Crush me? Make me question everything I ever trusted between us? Is that what you meant to do? Because if so, you succeeded. Completely and absolutely. That’s exactly what youdid.”
I hate the wetness on my cheeks. I hate the cracking of my voice. Most of all I hate that I still care enough I can’t keep from crying in front ofhim.
“I’msorry.”
Done. I'm so done. I cannot do this anymore. Can't listen to anymore of his lies. “Stop saying you’re sorry. Stop saying you want me and you love me and you didn’t mean to hurt me. You can’t take any of it back just because you’re jealous. We both know you're only here because you want what you can’thave.”
He doesn't flinch from my yelling up at him. Probably my stale morning breath wafting in his face. Instead he grins. With a sensual cockiness I use to love. When the seductiveness was meant forme.
“I did have you. Several times, if I remember correctly.” His fingertips wander down from my throat to the vee of my kimono. “And I’ll have youagain.”
“No…”
Why do I sound so unsure? I need to be confident. Or at least imply that I am even if I’m not. “This is finished. I have things I need to do. Ican’t–“
“What do you need todo?”
“Call Leighton.” Now it’s his turn to heave. Deep breaths lifting his broad chest. Redness creeps up his taut face. “Better yet, go over to his house. I’m sure I can find a way to convince him to take meback.”
His hand claws back to my throat again, and I'm pinned in place. Trapped by his strength over me and my weakness forhim.
“I’ve already told you, it’s over betweenyou.”
This time I smile. Toss up my chin with a defiance I don't feel but attempt just the same. “You don’t decide that. You gave up any rights to influence my decisions when you dumpedme.”
“I will kill him if he touches youagain.”
“You already told me that too. You need some new material because your threats are worthless to me. Just like I was toyou.”
My voice breaks at the end. Betraying my true heart. Revealing my false bravado. I’m not as tough as I claim to be. He’s not either from the shame pulling down his expression. He finally steps back. Letting me breathe. Making me miss histouch.
