Page 80 of The Pumpkin Spice Spell
I turn and Willa stands a few feet away, her jacket pulled tight around her, her face unreadable. I know that look. That tightness. That stillness. She heard me.
Her voice is careful, soft and sharp all at once. “Are you leaving?”
“I don’t know,” I admit, honest and hating it. “It’s a lot of money. I could do it real quick and come back.”
There’s a beat of silence. She blinks once, slow. “Real quick,” she echoes, like the words taste bitter. “What about Remy? What about the tree farm? This is his busiest season. He’s counting on you.”
“I know, I just?—”
“And what about me?” Her voice cracks now, high and tight and wounded. “What about us? You’re just going to up and leave?!”
I take a step toward her, but she steps back as if I lit a match. “Willa?—”
“No,” she says, breathless. “You don’t get to do that right now.”
I feel like something is sliding out from under me. The ground is tilting. “It’s not like that,” I say, desperate. “I’m not trying to leave. I just…I don’t know, okay? It’s good money. It’s familiar. I’m good at it.”
“You’re good at a lot of things,” she snaps. “You’re good here. With me. But you’re afraid. So you’re looking for an escape hatch.”
I freeze. She’s wrong, but now she doesn’t trust me. And that makes it worse.
She exhales sharply, and the wind blows her hair across her face. She doesn’t move to fix it. “I thought you were choosing us,” she whispers. “I thought we were building something. But if you’re already looking for ways to walk away...” Her voice fades.
She shakes her head. One hard shake like she’s clearing me out. “I guess it didn’t mean anything. Then go,” she says. Quiet and final. And she turns and walks away. She doesn’t look back.
I stand there, useless, the cold sinking into my skin like it belongs there. She’s right. I am afraid.
Afraid that if I stay, I’ll screw it up. That I’ll let her down. That I’ll find a way to fail the one thing I want most.
It’d be easier to leave. But God, I don’t want to. I just don’t know how to trust that staying won’t blow up in my face.
And now? Now I might’ve messed up everything.
Chapter 23
Willa
Do you know what I realized today?
I never really belonged to the sea.
I belong to you.
-Tate
Islam the teakettle onto the counter hard enough to rattle the sugar jar sitting behind it.If I don’t slam something then, I might shatter. And I’m not shattering over Tate Holloway again. I swore I wouldn’t.
“Why is he doing this?” I snap, voice sharp and wild in the calm of the bookstore. “Why would he evenconsiderleaving again?”
The tea sloshes in the cup. Cobweb lifts her head from her patch of sunlight on the front display and blinks at me likeyou okay, mother?
“No, I amnotokay,” I inform the cat, whose ears are back as she watches me with alarm.
Ivy leans her elbows on the front desk, sipping something with lavender and lemon and zero patience. “I mean, let’s be honest, he’s a deep-sea fisherman. This is what he knows.”
Rowan snorts. “He’s also a Scorpio. That means he is impulsive, and he likes danger.”
I throw my hands up. “Does itmatter?He’s considering getting on a boat and disappearing for six weeks like this life we’ve built is just optional. And what if something happens and he doesn’t come back? Do you know how I felt all those years that he was gone? I felt like he was dead, like dad. And now he’s back, and I could lose him again.”
