Page 149 of The Eternal Mirror
“Yes.” I’d presumed that when I came into my magic, the dark place was gone, that it was where my magic was hiding. Now I suspect I’ve been deluding myself. A little spark of excitement flames to life. I mean, I don’t want to be dark. But better dark than dead. At least I can worry about dark later; dead is just dead. Maybe.
“It could be,” Selene muses. “The Astrali males never inherit magic. But Lucifer didn’t inherit it; it was forced on him when the spell was cast. It was never meant to happen. So we have no way of knowing how it would behave.”
I turn to Khaosti. “I’m scared.”
He takes my hand. “I know. But you can do this.”
“But what if I’m evil? What if I turn out worse than Khronus?”
“Khronus always carried the seeds of darkness,” Selene says. “And he twisted the magic in his own image. Vortex was never evil. He was just a man.”
“That’s usually enough,” I mutter. I take a deep breath. Then I pull free. This is something I need to do alone. I walk a little way into the trees, feeling their eyes on me every step of the way.
I can do this. I’m not afraid.
And I realize I’m not. I’ve grown so much since that time with Hecate. I wasn’t ready then. I could never have dealt with what I found. But I know myself now. I know I’m not evil. I choose to be good. My life, my choice.
I close my eyes and clear my mind. Then I sink down inside myself. Down and down. I pass Frenzy, and she stirs inside me before quieting as if to say ‘you don’t need me; you’ve got this’.
I don’t fight the feelings swirling inside me. And finally, I sense it, a wall surrounding...something. This time, I will a crack to form in the smooth surface. It slowly widens.
I don’t flinch. I don’t run. I don’t scream.
And it splits wide open.
The darkness spills out like oil, slow and thick, and filled with magic. It doesn’t rush me. It doesn’t attack. It just...waits.
And I embrace it.
For a moment, I’m nothing. No body. No breath. No name.
Only cold. And pulse. And power.
It wraps around me—not like chains, but like skin. Like it’s always been part of me, and it’s happy to be free.
The beat of it matches my heart. The voice of it hums inside my bones. It whispers not of vengeance, or rage, or hate.
It whispers,I am here.
And I whisper back:Then let’s finish this.
The darkness answers like a second heartbeat.It is time.
I blink open my eyes. The world is the same. But I have changed. I’m complete.
I walk back to the others. I meet Selene’s eyes and nod.
I don’t want to say goodbye. It’s been said before. But this feels momentous. I have to say something. I settle on, “I’ll be back.” I’ve always wanted to say that.
Zayne snorts. “Go do your thing, princess.”
“Don’t call me princess.”
I stop beside Josh and kiss the top of his head. “Grow up good,” I say.
“I will.”
“I know.”
