Page 27 of The Worst Guy Ever
“Whatever.” I push past him, but he grabs my shoulders, and he spins me to face him just the way I’d hoped.Yes, there’s the man I love to hate.
“Hattie, Luke was dealt a shitty hand in life. He never knew his dad, his mum worked crazy hours, he and I were the ultimate latchkey kids, and then when he sorted his life out and fell in love, his wife got cancer and died.” I try to push him away, but he pushes me back harder. “And it wasn’t fast. It put them through hell, and me too. Heather was one of my best friends. After she died, I wasn’t sure I’d ever see Luke smile again, let alone find another chance at happiness. So yeah, I’m over the fucking moon for him. And I know you’re happy for Kara. Maybe if you quit your‘Hattie Buchanan, ice queen who doesn’t give a shit about anything’act you’d be able to truly experience their joy too.”
My mouth opens, but no sound comes out. My breath catches in my throat. There are no words for how deeply he’s cut me. Rob lets go, settling his hands on his hips as he takes a deep breath and stares up at the ceiling.
“I…I’m sorry,” I eventually manage to croak out. I’m an awful person. Insensitive and cruel. I hadn’t been thinking about any of that stuff. “I didn’t mean—”
“And I never said I don’t believe in marriage,” Rob huffs as he walks away.
I avoid my reflection in the bathroom while I calm myself down. I consider leaving, but when I go to make my excuses, I find everyone on the patio. Kara has lit the firepit, and they’ve gathered on garden chairs to toast marshmallows. The only vacant seat is the one next to Rob’s, so I take it begrudgingly. There’s a chill in the air, so I’m grateful for the warmth of the flames, wiggling my toes as close as I can without scorching them.
“I can’t believe it,” Rob says to Kara as she presses plump marshmallows onto the end of our skewers. “You’re gonna get married, and have kids, and I’m gonna be fun Uncle Rob. Do you think I’ll be a good uncle?”
“I think you need to slow down,” she laughs. “One step at a time.” Still, she settles into Luke’s lap and he pulls a blanket tight around them both. I give it six months before we’re repeating this night with baby news. Christ, I’m miserable today. This is such a joyous occasion, and I’m just dragging myself down. I don’t mean to be an ice queen, and I hate that it’s how everyone sees me.
“Do you want kids?” Rob asks, shifting his chair closer to mine. I can only stare, partly shocked at the question, mostly that he’s talking to me at all after scolding me so thoroughly inside the house.
“Do you know what happens to women in my industry when they have kids?”
“Ooft,” he takes a big drink and turns his body sideways to face me. “I have a feeling I’m about to find out.”
“They meet someone, they get all loved up, they shack up, get married and start a family. Then, they move away somewhere they can afford a bigger house to raise the kid in, and then they get a dog, and then they have another kid, and do they come back to work? No, they do not.
“And it’s not because they don’t want to, but because it’s impossible for them to juggle family and career, in a decent house, even though they’ve been told their whole life that they can have it all. Except it’s a scam because they don’t get promoted, they don’t get pay rises, and childcare in this country is a joke. The ones who do come back are almost always barely earning anything, and the workload makes them burn out fast.” He sits back a little, out of reach of my jabby, furious hands. I don’t give a shit though. I’m on a roll, my words unleashed as I twist my marshmallow over the flames.
“Meanwhile, what are the dads doing? They just keep climbing up and up in the world, taking everything they can. When I look up in my company, I see a bunch of boring old men at the top. You better believe I’m coming for them and nothing is getting in the way.”
“So that’s a no to kids?” he says, the corner of his mouth pulling up slightly.
“It’s a hell no.” I bite the crisped up marshmallow between my teeth and pull the stick away, throwing it into the fire. One is enough for me, and I’m going to need to go before my ranting ruins everyone’s evening.
“Wow. I want a bunch of them. Though I think some of my swimmers might have gotten killed off this week,” he says, nudging my shoulder with a gentle bump.
That lightens the mood, and I press my lips together to stifle a laugh. “Oh yeah? How’s that?”
“Some psycho kneed me in the balls.”
“I’m sure you deserved it.” I move to head inside, then reconsider when his words truly sink in. “Tell me, Rob, how do you think you’re going to become a father when you have a different woman in your bed every night?”
“Well, I don’t want them yet. But someday.”
What stupid, ignorant, patriarchal bullshit. Of course, he thinks he can have a lifetime of sticking his dick in anything that moves and then decide to have a baby whenever it suits him. “Well, please tell me when that day comes so I can channel some budget into an international ad campaign and warn the women of the world that Rob Serial Shagger Morgan is about to unleash his sperm on the world.”
His brow furrows. “And what will you do with your child free life?”
“Whatever the fuck I want.” I stand up and stare down at him. He spreads his knees wide to let me past and I hover between them. “I’ll work, win awards, spend time with my family and friends, travel, have adventures.”
Will I? It’s not like I’m doing much of that now.
“And if I’m ever bored, I’ll hop on a plane to Italy and spend my weekends eating pasta and screwing waiters.” I shove past him and make my way inside the house for another drink. I guess I can stay for a little bit more of a spar with Rob.
“I’m a quarter Italian, you know,” he calls after me.
“And three quarters dickhead,” I yell back.
Chapter 11
Rob
