Page 13 of The Best Book Boyfriend
Luke:How should we do this then?
Kara:Do what?
Luke:My book thoughts. Do you want marks out of ten? A review?
Kara:You’ve finished it already?
Luke:I couldn’t put it down! I had to know if she got on the plane with him.
Kara:I loved that bit. I really thought the author was going to pull a switch and make him stay for her, but she had no reason to stick around.
The other books are waiting for me when I get home and I dive straight intoRoomies,the shorter of the two. It’s so good that I have to force myself to take a break to eat dinner. Kara was right about the tension. I’m punching the air when Guz and Sam share their first kiss and then, minutes later, getting all choked up when it looks like Sam will have to transfer specialties to a different teaching hospital. I’m rooting for them so much I have to remind myself that they’re not real people.
Luke:You did not tell me Roomies would make me want to cry
Kara:I told you had romance all wrong.
Luke:I’m beginning to see the error of my ways
Kara:GOOD. I knew you weren’t a lost cause.
We end up texting back and forth all week. As I read, I send her my thoughts, along with various photos. I wish she’d follow my lead and send me one of her. I keep opening her little profile image in WhatsApp, but it’s a professional one that’s quite different from the woman who sat down at my window table last week. When I picture her in my head, she’s softer, but just as beautiful. Her hair is straight in her photo, and last week it was a bit more wild and wavy. In her photo, she’s wearing the bright pink cardigan she had on, and I wonder what it would feel like to wrap my arms around her.
By Thursday I’ve nearly finishedSnowed Inn,and I really want to see her again. Mostly so I can see her face while we chat and tell her how wrong I was. Neither of us have mentioned meeting up again, but if our text chats are anything to go by, it’s worth seeing how it goes in person. I’ve got nothing to lose, so I shoot my shot.
Luke:I don’t know what your work schedule is like, but if you’re free for coffee tomorrow I need more recommendations.
Chapter 7
Kara
Coffeetomorrow?Morerecommendations.Shit. That sounds like a date.
Except I’m assuming he means at his work, and no man in his right mind would suggest a date at his place of work, would they? Definitely no Book Boyfriend would do that.
Chill out Kara, it’s just coffee.Coffee I can do. After texting so much this week, coffee with Luke is something I would actually quiteliketo do.
I can’t pretend my heart doesn’t do a little happy dance every time I get a new notification from him. Sometimes I wake up to a message and it makes me wonder if he thinks of me as soon as he wakes up, or if he’s just on an early shift.
I open up my work calendar. I’m pretty sure tomorrow is quite a light afternoon, but double booking myself is my worst nightmare. My clients should feel like they are the most important people in my world. If I had to drop one to see another, I’d feel absolutely awful about it.
Kara:My last meeting is at 3. I could swing by after if you’re still open?
Luke:Perfect, see you then.
What the girls said last week has really stuck with me. I’m not an idiot, I know it’s nearly a year since Adam left. I’ve been trying to push it out of my mind in the misguided hope that somehow that day will simply not happen. Perhaps there is still time to pray to our Aztec ancestors or the Romans or whoever it was that invented the calendar and plead with them to make the day disappear entirely.
A year. Twelve entire months. And my birthday before then too. Part of me can’t quite fathom how I’m existing. How do I manage to get up and live every day without him? I know I shouldn’t feel that way. Hattie would be livid if I ever said it out loud.
I know I should reframe these thoughts and turn them into a positive. I should be proud I’ve survived nearly a year without him. It’s an achievement, of sorts. I should probably set myself some goals for what relationships might look like in my thirties, but what if I fall in love with someone and then in another twelve years they piss off without an explanation too? I couldn’t handle having my heart broken this badly again.
Those sneaky bitches said they’d made a pact to give me a year to wallow, and I know that’s what I’ve been doing, but I don’t know how they expect me to just wake up after a year and feel over it.
Romantic relationships aside, I think I’ve been doing well. Work is going great. I’ve landed a couple of brilliant projects this year, and my Instagram account has gone from strength to strength. Especially now that I’ve got full control of it and don’t have to run my ideas by Adam.
It took me ages to work up the courage to tell our followers that we’d split up. I didn’t know how to say it, but some of them had been on our home journey for years and were asking where he was. We, sorry,Ilost a bunch of followers but I didn’t care. I’d rather have Adam than followers, and anyway I’ve gained many more back now that I’ve got a bit of a niche as a single woman who does her own home makeovers and DIY content.
Texting with Luke has been a really fun distraction this week. I wasn’t sure whether three recommendations was a bit much, but figured it was payback for being so wrong about romance, and to his credit, he’s read them all.
